noa_ashley_'s reviews
486 reviews

"Maybe the scariest thing that can ever happen to a person is falling in love." - Edin

I love this book so much! Edin is a single dad. His daughter Mo (Morgan), always worries about him, she just feels way to much responsibility for a child. This is because of how her mom treated her and her dad and she saw more of her dad struggling with his mental health then he had thought. She is very protective over her dad so that meant that Elijah really had to work for it. She has everyone wrapped around her finger. 

Mo: “Promise you’ll take care of my dad?” 
Elijah: “I will do anything at all to take care of your dad, Mo. Anything.”

Edin has his best friend Dak and River (sparrow), he asked them for help, years ago (in book one: "Rumor has it" which ended 3 years before this book started). Elijah was always there for Edin and eventually Edin let him in. This all was with a lot respect and it felt right. Edin has commitment issues and Elijah never pressured him in giving them a label. Eventually Elijah realized that life isn't all about being a dad. ALSO HIS BI-AWAKENING MOMENT!!! Elijah just really made Edin touch starved or maybe Edin has always been touch starved and is Elijah the one that makes him feel safe enough to show that side of himself. Their relationship is so healthy and genuinely it's everything that they both deserve. Elijah is an amazing (step) dad to Mo. Their little family is everything! Also Edin accepting Zeke as a part of Elijah and Elijah accepting Mo as a part of Edin!!! I stared crying around chapter 30, all the way until the last page. 5 stars! This book has everything that I love and need in a book. 

I love that the characters Crea writes can be vulnerable around each other and ask for hugs and cuddles from their friends without judgement. Everyone needs love and to be taken care of sometimes. This book also has some of the most beautiful hurt/comfort chapters. 

I received an ARC copy of this book.

"You love so deeply and just want everyone to be okay. You’re one of the strongest, most loyal people I’ve ever known, and more people should be like you." - Hayden

"He kisses me, pulling my body to his, making me feel safe and protected in a way I've never felt and didn’t even know I wanted until now." - Lola

Lola is the sibling with the last amount of drama at least until she started seeing Hayden. But would it really be a Sterling without chaos. Lola is the oldest sibling, the one that is always taking care of everyone and I'm glad that she has found love for herself. This serie deals with grief. A family member past away and this serie is about grieving that person and finding love. Hayden is so sweet and caring, they are so good to each other. Both of them have their own traumas and past. They talk about that because they want to understand each other. This is the first book in the Serie where it just felt right from the start for me, their relationship isn't toxic it's just the people around them that have to figure their own problems out and that has affect on Lola & Hayden. I'm glad that Hayden knows how amazing she is. She's been my favorite Sterling from the start. 

“Life is painful. Love is even more painful.” - Vivienne

“I need this. I can’t live like this anymore. I’m drowning.” - Asher

It was also good to read about Asher and Vivienne's situation from a different perspective and I love Sebastian (Vivienne's son), I'm glad that they (the Sterling Family) are working on themselves because Sebastian deserves to grown up with people that treat each other with genuine love and are the best versions of themselves. He is the sunshine in the family. 

This book is republished under the name N. Brown (Nicole Dykes her pen name). I received an ARC copy of this book.

"We were only here because Sully had shattered my carefully constructed walls. In reality, he owned me." - Malik

"I tried to love him. Maybe I did, but I didn’t know what it felt like to love someone." - Sully

In this second book in The serie, Malik and Sid started "District." This book has time jumps and in the first book of the serie 'His Death Bringer' this company already exists.

There is a lot of manipulation from both sides, pushing each other and a lot of self-hate from Malik. They just used each other over and over again. There is an age gap that's nearly 20 years. Malik takes Sully in when Sully is 16 years old. Sully has always wanted Malik (from very early in the book) and he got what he wanted a few years later on a night that Malik was very vulnerable. It was on a day that (a few decades age) was very traumatizing for Malik and every year on that day, it all comes back to him. Malik feels guilty and he feels like he doesn't deserve love or to enjoy himself because of what happened, and of course because of the betrayal part of this book. They are together (together = spicy time) every year on that exact day, that is the only day Malik allowed himself to be with Sully. For a VERY long time.

I really tried to love this book but the lack of talking and understanding (how can you understand each other if you don't try to talk?) annoyed me a lot. They just wasted all those years because they thought that they knew what the other wanted and needed. I understand that talking is difficult but they didn't even try to just expected the other to know, especially Malik. In my opinion Malik didn't give Sully a way to form connections with other people because he wanted to protect him but in reality maybe it was just so that Sully only had Malik to turn to (Malik did this from the start! Since that Sully was 16 years).

Malik: “I’m not denying you. I’m denying myself. You know this.”

Sully: “No, you deny me by denying yourself. We both want this.”

It isn't weird that Sully wanted Malik since basically the start of living with him, he never formed a healthy relationship with an adult and was never treated with respect. Sully is a psychopath and he manipulates people, yes but how can he be better or try to be better, if he had never seen a healthy relationship between people?? People have always failed him. He was trying but I feel like Malik couldn't look further then the fact that Sully is a psychopath. Malik was hurting for so long and he made it everyone's problem.

3 stars, because the lack of communication was getting annoying and it took so long for Malik to say that he wanted (for example) cuddles while he has been the one that always said that it was just spicy time. How could Sully possibly know that things were different IF THEY DON'T TALK. It felt a bit boring and was dragging at times but this is Sully and Malik’s story and there were also parts that I did enjoy. Sully deserves better and I definitely liked him more, it's not his fault that the situations he was in, made him this way. Malik constantly reminded Sully of a person that Sully couldn't keep safe in conversations to make sure that Sully still had "empathy" and doesn't see that it is cruel and hurtful? But it is okay that Malik doesn't want to talk about his traumas?? That is just very weird to me. Sully is constantly reminded of that person even without Malik to bring it up. Malik his way of treating Sully was the biggest reason why I couldn't give it more than 3 stars.

The District is a dark romance serie where queer people are hired to take out bad people, they make the world a little bit safer in their own way. Along the way they found their family in each other.

"I love this version of masculinity where you’re allowed to grow up acknowledging that you love your friends and men also have emotions they’re not afraid of." - Dak

"There’s still so much more to learn. It’s Dak who’s teaching me." - Sparrow (Rivier) 

“It’s a window into exploring your sexuality while giving you whatever excuse you need to justify it. Easy cash. Competition to be the best. To prove you’re not gay. Say what you want as the reason you went, but the fact is, if you weren’t interested or curious, you wouldn’t show up.” - This is exactly what Rumor is, a safe space to explore with a camera and money attached to it. Dak went there because he was invited, he explored with Sparrow (River) and had his bi-awakening moment on camera. Growing up Dak saw a lot of different kinds of people and relationships. I really hoped that Dak could've talked about his feelings sooner. Even talking about his friends took some time. I think that I liked the side characters more then the main characters in this book. 

This book talks about problems within the LGBTQIA+ community and so much more. I really love that part of the book because it opens up important conversations and it makes you think about the other side of everything. That really make you think about it. Sparrow was also part of the problem (In my opinion) eventhough Stephen was the biggest problem in the book. I'm glad that his Sparrow's friends could talk to him about that, he really needed to see things in a different way. Ezlo is my favorite (side) character in this Serie at the moment. This book opened up a lot of conversation and I really loved that part of the book. I just didn't love the way things were going between Sparrow and Dak. I wished they could've talked more so they would understand each other better, sooner instead of thinking and worrying about it. Because it really wasn't about the fact that Dak was 5 years younger (Dak 20, River 25), it was so much more than that and it took Sparrow a long time to realize that. It made the book a bit slow. 

"You’re gorgeous, Luka. And I don’t just mean your looks. All of you is beautiful." - Zander

"Zander was an incredibly handsome man, but his looks were only a small part of what made him beautiful." - Luka

This book was so sweet, they understand each other so well. They can fully be themselves with each other and that is for both a new feeling. Zander & Luka are both anxious around people /crowed places, they help each other in those situations. Luka struggled a lot with his mental health, he overthinks a lot about basically everything. Zander is very good at reassuring him and knowing what he things and how he can help him. They talked a lot about their struggles. They were even talking (anonymous) about their feelings on the k!nky app, if they weren't sending spicy texts or calls. I loved how confident Zander was on the app and in their spicy times. He just knew how to make Luka feel good and safe with reminding him that they could stop at any moment. Luka could really relax in those moments, there was a lot going on in his mind and Zander could take him out of that place. 

They are both still in the closet (for a big part of the book) and I'm glad that Willow wrote that with their ages (Luka 26, Zander 29) because everyone does things in their own time. I really loved reading about Zander's friendship with his ex wife. I had a harder time reading about Luka and his friends, I know that people can change but it's just sad that some people have to know a queer person in order to (finally) respect them. It just hurts that people still get treated this way and I appreciate that it was written in this book, it's sadly still reality. I really love this found family serie and reading how different all the books are. I'm glad they have a safe work place to come back to.

I received an ARC copy of this book. 

"Angel was my wounded warrior. Each scar was from the battles he had lost and won. He may have bled and hurt, but he came back stronger and was a man I looked up to. " - Luca

"I wasn’t an angel. He was. The one sent to heal me." - Dante

To be completely honest, I didn't know what to think about Dante until later in the book. He was very confused about his feelings, and he gave mixed signals to Luca. After they had conversations about Dante's past and Luca explained that he didn't want to leave, something changed between them. Dante is just so sweet and caring, he didn't allow himself to be like that because of his past and work. Also I love Cleo the dog. Dogs are amazing, she protected Luca from the start, she was always around him, trying to comfort him, when he had nightmares or when his feelings were to much for him to handle.

I really love that Dante gave Luca full control during their first spicy time. I think that was healing for Luca. There are flashbacks throughout this book from both Dante and Luca their past and traumas. Dante safed Luca's life in the beginning of this book and from that moment, Luca trusted Dante, he felt safe around him, he knew that Dante wouldn't hurt him that he was different from all the men that hurt him for 11 years. Luca was also very scared that Dante would leave him, because he gave him his freedom back and he just loves him unconditionally because of it. They had a lot of conversations about that because Dante didn't understand how he could fully trust him after what he's been through, Dante was scared that Luca would see him as those men or that he would trigger him. There is an age gap of 10 years (Luca 19, Dante 29). Courtney wrote this story with a lot of care, every story is different, everyone reacted differently and that is okay. Sometimes you just don't understand someone's feelings or behaviors but you just have to trust the person that THEY know their own feelings. That is a message what was brought up a lot in this book and it was written beautifully!

The District is a dark romance serie that follows queer people that are hired to take out bad people, they make the world a little bit safer in their own way. Along the way they found their family in each other. Full of hurt/comfort and found family. 

"Mia’s presence was threaded through every corner of my world." - Ethan

"Spending the night sitting next to my best friend, I found comfort in just being." - Mia

This book is full of heartwarming and heartbreaking moments, Ethan and Mia are best friend and coworkers since a long time. They both work in the music industry. Mia finds out that she is sick at the start of this book (I will tell you what sickness in the last part of my review and Spoilers that I want to talk about) her world changes completely from that point, she needs to focus on getting better. Eventually she tells Ethan that she is sick and he temporarily moves in with her to help her. They both struggle with their feelings for each other. It's written so beautifully and with a lot of care. I love how the romance was part of this book but wasn't the main focus, it fit amazingly in this their story. 


⚠️ Spoilers, you can stop reading now ⚠️ 

Mia has cancer, I'm writing this in my review because I as a reader and person that has seen this sickness closer by,  would want to know this before starting a book. It is in the trigger warnings, make sure to check those. Ethan helps her with her treatments and is always there for her. Ethan lost a son (stillborn) and I really appreciate how thoughtful that was written. His son will always have a place in his heart and his family with Mia.

I received an ARC copy of this book from the author! Thank you so much, this was the first book I've read by her and I'm excited to read more in the future. 

"It’s the complete acceptance that means so much, and he’s the only person in the world I get that from." - JT

"He is what I hadn’t known I’d been waiting for. He is what I’ve been missing." - Marshall

I really love respect and talking about boundaries and this book did that in the most perfect and beautiful way! JT's parents try to push him in a future that they want for him, his parents just don't understand that he is happy and that he makes his own decisions (JT is 22) and his dad's best friend Marshall (he is 40) is the only one that understood from the start. This book is very important to me, maybe because I know from own experience how it is to be treated like JT about my own future.

Marshal understands himself and others so well. He pays attention to their feelings, expressions and body language. It feels so good to read about a character that just understands feelings sometimes even better than JT knows his own feelings and where they are coming from. And of course was this book spicy but it made it so much more meaningful because they could try new things with someone that they trust, because they had a deep connection, they could talk about everything and most importantly they accepted each other for who they truly are. Marshall and John have been best friends since before JT was born, Marshall lived somewhere else so he didn't see JT a lot and they never saw each as family but as dad's best friend/best friend's son, in a way Marshall is family just not as an uncle!

Marshall was scared to lose John (JT's dad), it's the only family he has, the conversations between Marshall and John were a lot about John not accepting that JT has his own life and makes his own decisions. It's just very painful to read. This book has a lot of conversations between Marshall & John with moments were they look back at their friendship. I understand that John wants the best for his son but on the other side, JT's parents didn't see JT, they didn't show interest in the most important parts of JT's life, in his interests. Marshall did, he always shows him that he cares, that he sees JT's wants and needs.

“Loving someone is the best thing you can do for them. It’s not some magic fix, but it makes us stronger, and from that strength, anything is possible.” - Reggie

It was good that JT could talk about his relationship with Reggie, his best friend. Even if their not into the same stuff, they can still talk about their differences without judgement and with respect.

I received an ARC copy of this book. Thank you so much!!!

“I think you deserve the time to find out who you are, Asher Sterling.” - Vivienne

“I think you deserve the same damn thing, Vivienne Crenshaw.” - Asher

It's the way I really love this serie but it's stressing me out at the same time! A family member died and in this serie you follow the Sterlings finding love while grieving that person at the time. It's important to read this Serie in order. There is a cliffhanger in this book.

Vivienne does everything for her son Sebastian, and to give her more time to also be herself and explore she lives with Asher who is Sebastian's uncle. Vivienne and Asher both had a difficult childhood where their parents expected them to be "perfect" or "like" their sibling. There is a lot of pain and self sabotaging in this book. Especially Asher doesn't let himself be happy. Even though his family is very loving and does everything for each other, they are all hurting and toxic which has a lot to do with grief. I'm looking forward to the next books and I really hope that they all can heal and treat each other a lot nicer! Because this was a roller-coaster. I'm also glad that they all have Sebastian in their lives! He is the sunshine in the family, everyone loves him so much!

This book is republished under the name N. Brown (Nicole Dykes her pen name). I received an ARC copy of this book.

This is a Christmas holiday novella where we follow Molly and Juan Manuel, they have already been in a relationship and loving together for a few years now. Juan Manuel has some secrets in this novella and all the people around Molly are acting suspicious. She doesn't understand why until she gets her present!!! I'm really loving this couple and this serie