ms_tiahmarie's reviews
1089 reviews

I see another reader (John) on goodreads wrote something akin to 'Another great book that is difficult to recommend.' How true. Because this is a brilliant book, that will stick with me for years. It is powerful, on so many levels. Discussions around tables could go on for hours on the themes and ideas being toyed and teased. Yet, with quiet family drama, Mantel pokes at so much emotion, slithering in and striking where it hurts the most - it isn't exactly the type of book you wrap up and stick under the Christmas tree for your unsuspecting fellow bookworm.

I am very GLAD I did not know how emotionally challenging the book would be or I probably would have avoided it, given my current mental state. Nor can I say it did anything positive to said mental state. However, the issues - religion, goodness, right / wrong, family mechanics, justice (or lack of), poverty, privilege - she nails many issues that are constantly on my mind when tackling my own work. I didn't feel so much jealousy or envy, more: this is how its done. Wondering if it deserved a small applause.

A few places had me wondering if she would have used the same words / phrases now. Language of South African poverty and privilege has evolved and there still smacks of bit of colonialism attitude in some of the scenes. Yet, that may have been done on purpose to reflect the characters inner struggles with their own situation and prejudices and have nothing to do with Mantel's own views.

I picked this up expecting an easy light romance read. Instead it was a rather sombre women's comic lit, heavier than anticipated. I'm not sure I did enjoy reading it. But the overall read left me ponderous. Which is why I decided to add it to the goodreads list.

I've been waiting for this book for ages, and it was well worth it. A worthy read. This book is difficult to put into words, so I give you the link to a review: http://www.litnet.co.za/Article/home-is-where-the-hurt-is-diane-awerbucks-home-remedies

This is not a book easily categorised. A non-fiction book, yes. Part memoir, yes. Part medical observances, yes. Then there is poetry and musing on how we live life - both socially, politically, career-wise and in the family. What I would not call it, is a self-help book. Yet, it may help. But no, the book does not strive to solve all your life's problems. Nor will it.

Over the course of the year I have had to come to terms that my health problems are not curable. At least two of them are chronic conditions. Chronic - it will not end until I do. What I had to finally say to myself is, 'I will not live in fear.' To stop worrying how bad it will be later. This is very different from living in denial or some fantasy land where all is happy-go-lucky. One needs to do today what one can to ensure the body works as best it can in the future. This means being aware of the condition, the options to manage it and making sure life is - as best one can - lived to cause minimal harm. But one must still live. And one must not sit and stew, creating horrific scenarios playing 'what if.' Practical - fine. But spending too much time worrying that someday I may be unable to write / walk - or whatever - is only going to make living today harder.

Neither condition is like breaking a bone. There is no perfect manual that says, 'If X happens, do Y.' It is more of guessing game between PT, medicine and making changes in my day-to-day life. Nor does the PT and meds always 'work' the way we thought they would. There is this fine line we all walk, trying to make things better and not worse. Sometimes something looks promising and actually turns out to be a poor choice. Learning as we go, while still trying to live a life.

Having others in my life respect my new boundaries and being willing to help or work within my boundaries is helpful.

What does not help is people telling me to 'not give up hoping for a cure.' The cure will be discovered or not regardless if I hope for one. Right now I'm busy figuring out how to open a can or get my groceries loaded into the car. Or how to type out my thoughts. Practical suggestions in these matters ARE helpful (like the person who reminded me that there IS the invention called an electric can opener). Hoping for a cure does not actually DO anything, nor does it make it any more or less likely for a cure to be discovered.

Nor do I have patience for those who ask me me to be grateful for my current state. I am, however, grateful the author addressed this - especially the load of crap heaped on cancer patients as if their 'negative attitude' CAUSED cancer.

The author also has a chronic condition. What I took away from her words is a woman trying to learn to live with her body. That her body is also linked to her mind, and the two co-exist together. What happens to one can impact the other - but not necessarily 'cure' each other. There needs to an understanding so one can live - keep mentally sane - while also an acceptance that THIS is the body you live with. There are unknowns. There are question marks hanging over the body's future. How we mentally deal with this unknown - like the unknowns in all aspects of life - will dictate how well a person lives each day.

This is not an advocacy to plaster smiles / stiff upper lip / deny anything is wrong. In fact, the author is very honest about emotion, including the small sorrow that she felt when her project - this book - was at its conclusion. She brings out the imagery of a dance - the mind and body learning to move out of respect of one another. To be give the self space to morn / grieve - yet also not to wallow.

Such fine lines. We like things put in sound bites: Be positive! Exercise is healthy! Work hard!
The truth, however, does not fit so neatly into slogans. Which is perhaps why I am rambling rather than describing this book.

What I do know is this: I read many, many books - more than I even bother to list on goodreads. There are books that I enjoy, but never loan or buy for another because I can not easily pin-point people I know in my life who are a good match for that book. Then there are books that while I read them names of people who also NEED this book keep popping into my head. I have already bought two copies of this book. I easily see myself giving this to three more people. Not loaning - because I visualise them wanting their own to lend to others. I look forward to hearing what bits intrigued others. I am sure there will be many differing responses. As for me - I've got over 30 stickies peeping out from the pages.

It is that kind of book.

I felt like I was in a cutting-edge museum looking at a piece of art that has gone where no other artist had gone before. I admired the craft and intelligence that went into creating such a unique creation. Yet, I had no desire to take it home.

Admired it? Yes.
Love it? No. A matter of taste, I suppose.

Sweet, while weaving the heartache into the sugar.

I borrowed this book from my MIL. Now that I've read it I'm rather sad that I do not own it so I can read it again. Thoughts on life, expectations, percepion and how this shifts the idea of reality. Hertitage, connection and blood lines wrap around the concept of belonging. (No spell check on this computer...)

A very good read. Lots to think about. I doubt climate change disbelievers will read this book, which is a shame. In many ways, she defends why they hold their position and the lifestyle, which is seriously unappreciated. (Farmers are rarely beloved after the nursery rhyme stage.) The explanation for climate change and why people are confused over the issue (and how science works) is explained in a very readable manner.

But it is the yuppies, the people like myself (educated bookworm that DOES fly on airplanes and owns two cars) who will be reading the book - and see the faults in our own lifestyles and choices.

It is a shame that the spotted owl and many of the environmental movements drew the line in the sand against the very people who actually live in the nature (rural areas!), grow our food and provided the raw materials we need. (What have you wiped your butt with lately? Leaves? Or toilet paper made from trees? Exactly.) Hunters, ranchers, farmers, fishermen, loggers - these were once a group of professionals that were a fountain of info and were also invested in the earth's future. But the environmental movement - rather than work with them, try to glean their knowledge, try to find solutions that were in balance and preserved such a way of growing our food - killed them off and gave the multi-nationals a way in that now truly destroy the earth.

This not a book of solutions, but a story of grey areas where the lines are not drawn between blue states and red. It also takes the 'good guy / bad guy' hats off and blurs the lines, showing that the blame is not so easily to pin point - and lots of good intentions are actually useless and misguided.

I love books that delve into the grey. Much to ponder.

I confess, I only read the first book properly and skimmed the other two. This is not a reflection on the story - and I still DO hope to read the two later books in the manner they deserve. The fault lies in my buying the trilogy hardbound all together. My hands cannot support such a book and it made reading it a literal pain. The only reason I've now marked this as 'read' is that I've now lent my copy to another. A person with healthy arms, wrists and fingers who will have no trouble with such an edition.

Note to self, next time buy things one by one.

A story that tackles class, change, commitment and believing in yourself. A story that is bitter sweet.

spoilerish comment**************************



However, I'm rather over the idea that a broken heart from teenage years, even if there were many 'could-have-beens' would be clung to well into old age. I suppose there is the case of looking back, being able to build a person up to mythical proportions, rather than the man one has now. But Lottie's story line rang slightly false given the way her character was drawn. She may have been bitter of how things panned out, the fact she HAD to marry - but even so, she struck me as the type that makes do. Not one to moon over the past.

A quibble, really.