jamgrl's reviews
180 reviews

I understand now why this book has made such a mark. The first half, I felt like “yeah, this is good, John Green is a good writer” but I also had this dual sense of I don’t think I would have liked this as a teen, largely because so was such a goodie two shoes I wouldn’t have found it relatable, and as an adult, it just felt so teen. But then the second half hit and I totally turned around. It was brilliant. The realizations Miles had about his own character flaws and the ways he had to grapple with not really knowing someone, the final prank which made me laugh and cry, the remaining ambiguity of the mystery which felt powerful and true. It surprised me how  raw it was able to go while remaining hopeful in the end. 

On THAT aspect (if you know, you know, Nabor spoiler ahead):

I had NO IDEA Alaska died in this book. I thought it was like Paper Towns, where she disappears and they have to LOOK for her. Sure, it’d be weird to do that twice, but I didn’t expect him to KILL A TEENAGER twice. Anyways, as a result, that part of the book was very effective; even had I known, I think it would have been. The shock and emotional response of the characters was very powerful and incredibly well done.

This book is incredible. The taglines say it is funny— it is funny in that it finds humor in the stories,  and it is written in a very matter-of-fact way rather than sitting in emotions, but that to me serves to elevate the horror, frankly. McCurdy makes a brilliant choice to write about her life in chronological order, in the voice of herself as she was going through events, and that  illustrates her mindset while clearly showing the abuse she received and the results of that abuse. It makes the lows lower and the highs higher. It was an addicting book and hearing it read in Jannette McCurdy’s voice made it hit harder. I think this book is an incredible and important read regardless of whether you are familiar with Jennette McCurdy, but as a childhood fan of iCarly, this book was painful. It both reframed what I remember about the show and was extra vivid because when she talks about the her experiences on set, the feelings she was having while shooting a specific scene, I remember the scene she is talking about. I was afraid to read this book because I thought it would be an emotionally hard read, which I was right about 😅, but it was so worthwhile in how  impactful it was. I also want to emphasize that it wasn’t just the events of the book— it is really tightly written. Celebrity memoirs are pretty hit or miss in terms of quality of writing and organization of the narrative— this one is just really really good. Of course, finding out that Jennette McCurdy wanted to be a writer from an early age makes experiencing her writing feel like it matters even more.