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cheesebagel's reviews
219 reviews
A Clash of Kings by George R.R. Martin
4.0
https://thebookmartian.wordpress.com/2021/08/09/a-game-of-thrones-and-a-clash-of-kings-by-george-r-r-martin-review/
The Fifth Season by N.K. Jemisin
5.0
this book destroys everything you think you know about books and rebuilds it in a way that, as far as I know, nobody else has done before. n.k is a gift to our generation. i am absolutely devastated that I only just discovered this series, 6 years after it was first published.
Anxious People by Fredrik Backman
4.0
5 stars because it made me cry and very few books have managed to do that.
Dune by Frank Herbert
2.0
okay okay, here it is. I finished this ages ago but I just really couldn't be bothered to write my review but the movie came out today and I honestly just want to forget about this lol.
here are the things I liked:
- I was quite into the socioeconomic criticism. I liked the intricacies of the politics as well as the general overarching 'exploiting people is bad' vibe, although of course that's not particularly unique for this kind of novel.
- also, I liked the setting. obviously I wish Frank Herbert had actual skill and could write beautiful descriptions of the desert, but what my own brain came up with visually was cool, so appreciated the vibes. thanks frank.
unfortunately this is where it ends. you will notice I only gave this book 2 stars. I was toying with 3 for so long, but then I realized that that was purely based on the cultural impact that this book had and I eventually came to the conclusion that I can't be giving out stars for something that isn't actually attributed to the quality of the writing. so 2 it is.
here are the things I didn't like. there are many.
- WRITING STYLE!!!!!! I can't talk about this enough honestly and I get that it's boring but I just haaaate a dull book. our guy Frank cannot write. it's just not his strong suit. neither is plot apparently. honestly I might get crucified for saying this but I don't think this book would have had the same reception if it was published this year as opposed to the 1960s. I honestly don't know why people are so hype for the movie. probably just because of Timothee and Zendaya.
- characters. they're boring. they're underdeveloped. they're tropey; fat evil guy, flawless hero!, love interest with no personality. let's delve into that. there is so much hype about how Paul is this super important almost mythological figure who's fulfilling some super vague and honestly kind of unimportant prophecy, but then Paul himself is actually not all that? it's like the book is trying to convince you that Paul is some super cool dude but only by telling you over and over again PAUL IS SUPER COOL. the only things Paul does is have some weird magic powers and he's good at beating people up apparently. lame. next, Chani. honestly half the reason I read this book was for her because she had so much potential to be this cool badass chick and then she basically just ended up being this empty character who just like. got pregnant and said nice things to Paul a lot. very obvious that this book was written by a man.
- the plotting was kind of spacey. idk if that word properly conveys what I mean, but basically every time something important happened, Herbert literally just jumped to the next chapter and made the reader fill in all the blanks themselves, which is kind of lazy imo like that's kind of your job as a writer isn't it? it also meant that I didn't have a super strong sense of the plot. like I could outline the events for you in bullet points, but it's not super clear how you get from one to another. there's a time gap of 2 years in the middle and it's very strange because it seems like the only reason for it is so that Alia can age enough to speak and cause problems, but the rest of the plot is not properly... connected?? so it feels very abrupt and I didn't appreciate it.
- finally. in my notes for this point I just wrote 'stupid stuff' so ill do my best to explain lol. this is little things that would not have affected my rating if the actual book had been good. nevertheless. why are the two main characters named Paul and Jessica when everybody else has super kooky futuristic names. PAUL and JESSICA? JESSICA??? seriously?? it took me like 1/4 of the book to stop giggling every time I read her name. also. why does Frank Herbert describe the appearance of his characters in the exact same way every time they're in a scene? yes okay we know, the one guy has an inkvine scar (whatever that is). yes, chani looks like an elf. we get it. you don't have to tell us 15 times.
there are probably spelling mistakes in this review but I really don't care bc I don't want to reread it lol. I honestly really wanted to like this book. I thought it was going to be sick and it ended up being so lame. would not recommend. also I will most definitely not be reading any of the sequels even though I have seen people say that they get better because I firmly believe that a book should not have to depend on other books to be good.
ok bye
here are the things I liked:
- I was quite into the socioeconomic criticism. I liked the intricacies of the politics as well as the general overarching 'exploiting people is bad' vibe, although of course that's not particularly unique for this kind of novel.
- also, I liked the setting. obviously I wish Frank Herbert had actual skill and could write beautiful descriptions of the desert, but what my own brain came up with visually was cool, so appreciated the vibes. thanks frank.
unfortunately this is where it ends. you will notice I only gave this book 2 stars. I was toying with 3 for so long, but then I realized that that was purely based on the cultural impact that this book had and I eventually came to the conclusion that I can't be giving out stars for something that isn't actually attributed to the quality of the writing. so 2 it is.
here are the things I didn't like. there are many.
- WRITING STYLE!!!!!! I can't talk about this enough honestly and I get that it's boring but I just haaaate a dull book. our guy Frank cannot write. it's just not his strong suit. neither is plot apparently. honestly I might get crucified for saying this but I don't think this book would have had the same reception if it was published this year as opposed to the 1960s. I honestly don't know why people are so hype for the movie. probably just because of Timothee and Zendaya.
- characters. they're boring. they're underdeveloped. they're tropey; fat evil guy, flawless hero!, love interest with no personality. let's delve into that. there is so much hype about how Paul is this super important almost mythological figure who's fulfilling some super vague and honestly kind of unimportant prophecy, but then Paul himself is actually not all that? it's like the book is trying to convince you that Paul is some super cool dude but only by telling you over and over again PAUL IS SUPER COOL. the only things Paul does is have some weird magic powers and he's good at beating people up apparently. lame. next, Chani. honestly half the reason I read this book was for her because she had so much potential to be this cool badass chick and then she basically just ended up being this empty character who just like. got pregnant and said nice things to Paul a lot. very obvious that this book was written by a man.
- the plotting was kind of spacey. idk if that word properly conveys what I mean, but basically every time something important happened, Herbert literally just jumped to the next chapter and made the reader fill in all the blanks themselves, which is kind of lazy imo like that's kind of your job as a writer isn't it? it also meant that I didn't have a super strong sense of the plot. like I could outline the events for you in bullet points, but it's not super clear how you get from one to another. there's a time gap of 2 years in the middle and it's very strange because it seems like the only reason for it is so that Alia can age enough to speak and cause problems, but the rest of the plot is not properly... connected?? so it feels very abrupt and I didn't appreciate it.
- finally. in my notes for this point I just wrote 'stupid stuff' so ill do my best to explain lol. this is little things that would not have affected my rating if the actual book had been good. nevertheless. why are the two main characters named Paul and Jessica when everybody else has super kooky futuristic names. PAUL and JESSICA? JESSICA??? seriously?? it took me like 1/4 of the book to stop giggling every time I read her name. also. why does Frank Herbert describe the appearance of his characters in the exact same way every time they're in a scene? yes okay we know, the one guy has an inkvine scar (whatever that is). yes, chani looks like an elf. we get it. you don't have to tell us 15 times.
there are probably spelling mistakes in this review but I really don't care bc I don't want to reread it lol. I honestly really wanted to like this book. I thought it was going to be sick and it ended up being so lame. would not recommend. also I will most definitely not be reading any of the sequels even though I have seen people say that they get better because I firmly believe that a book should not have to depend on other books to be good.
ok bye
Mordew by Alex Pheby
2.0
I read this for my office's book club. it was really weird and not in a good way. it started off fine, honestly. probably the finest point of this book is that the world-building is really creative. I'm not sure I know of anything that I could compare this to, though in fairness I have not read that much adult fantasy. (is this adult fantasy? now that I think about it perhaps it's YA. idk. whatever). beyond world-building though, this book falls pretty short.
the characterization is weak almost from the beginning, ESPECIALLY when it comes to prissy (and actually gam as well). prissy is basically the token girl and Nathan's relationship with her is really murky and weird the entire time. basically he has this like obsession with her that has zero explanation. it's like she's the first girl he's ever seen and he's instantly in love or something. idk. it's really weird because it seems like Pheby maybe intended her to be kind of interesting and cunning but..... didn't know how to do that?? so she ended up being really whiny and pathetic and basically her entirely plot line is like oo Nathan please save me, which is super lame. speaking of women in this book in general, it seems like they pretty much exist to be prostitutes. literally all of them except Dashini (whose name kept reminding me of Dasani water) and she doesn't even count because she's not introduced until the last like 100 pages and she's magical too so obviously she wasn't going to be a prostitute. anyway I digress.
I was going to give this three stars for the longest time because I was like okay, I dont love this, but it's still telling a complete story with most fictional elements intact but then halfway in it got really strange in a bad way. I feel like Pheby sketched an outline of how this story was supposed to play out but didn't properly connect one event to another, so when it came time to actually write he ended up connecting things by pure magic which is so lazy. there were things that were far too convenient to be plausible (obviously this is fantasy and there's magic so you can't really argue that something is impossible but STILL I think there should be some limits in order for there to be adequate tension and whatnot).
this book started to really bother me because I felt like Pheby was missing opportunities for interesting plot in favour of some really random stuff?? the randomness of this book was something that struck me in the beginning, but it kind of worked at first because it was quite cool and different. in the second half though it seemed like he was just pulling stuff out of his ass for no reason and it made things really jumbled and unsatisfying because they were so abstractly connected.
finally, the last point I made a note of to make was about Nathan. I think that all of the characters in this book were poorly developed, even Nathan who is the protagonist. but something that I didn't realize until the end, and that I consider a flaw, is that literally nobody cares about him like at all? his father supposedly does but there is never a conversation between them so there's no way to perceive that. his mother seems to like HATE him? she alternates between hugging him at random, beating him, and basically ignoring his existence and all of it goes totally unexplained. at the very end Nathan has a thought along the lines of "who are my friends anyway" and when I read that I was like hang on... ur right. gam and prissy betray him and there's no real reconciliation. his relationship with dashini seems to be one of convenience for both characters. I think Pheby wanted to make Nathan this like really pensive and solitary kid so he doesn't really say much ever at the expense of his relationships with people because he just like.... doesn't really talk to anybody that much. the hero needs helpers and friends on his journey. that's part of a good story. and this one is absolutely missing it.
I feel like I have written a lot so im gonna stop now loll. but yeah anyway this was kind of underwhelming. idk what all the people who praised it on the front cover read but it surely couldn't have been the same book as me.
the characterization is weak almost from the beginning, ESPECIALLY when it comes to prissy (and actually gam as well). prissy is basically the token girl and Nathan's relationship with her is really murky and weird the entire time. basically he has this like obsession with her that has zero explanation. it's like she's the first girl he's ever seen and he's instantly in love or something. idk. it's really weird because it seems like Pheby maybe intended her to be kind of interesting and cunning but..... didn't know how to do that?? so she ended up being really whiny and pathetic and basically her entirely plot line is like oo Nathan please save me, which is super lame. speaking of women in this book in general, it seems like they pretty much exist to be prostitutes. literally all of them except Dashini (whose name kept reminding me of Dasani water) and she doesn't even count because she's not introduced until the last like 100 pages and she's magical too so obviously she wasn't going to be a prostitute. anyway I digress.
I was going to give this three stars for the longest time because I was like okay, I dont love this, but it's still telling a complete story with most fictional elements intact but then halfway in it got really strange in a bad way. I feel like Pheby sketched an outline of how this story was supposed to play out but didn't properly connect one event to another, so when it came time to actually write he ended up connecting things by pure magic which is so lazy. there were things that were far too convenient to be plausible (obviously this is fantasy and there's magic so you can't really argue that something is impossible but STILL I think there should be some limits in order for there to be adequate tension and whatnot).
this book started to really bother me because I felt like Pheby was missing opportunities for interesting plot in favour of some really random stuff?? the randomness of this book was something that struck me in the beginning, but it kind of worked at first because it was quite cool and different. in the second half though it seemed like he was just pulling stuff out of his ass for no reason and it made things really jumbled and unsatisfying because they were so abstractly connected.
finally, the last point I made a note of to make was about Nathan. I think that all of the characters in this book were poorly developed, even Nathan who is the protagonist. but something that I didn't realize until the end, and that I consider a flaw, is that literally nobody cares about him like at all? his father supposedly does but there is never a conversation between them so there's no way to perceive that. his mother seems to like HATE him? she alternates between hugging him at random, beating him, and basically ignoring his existence and all of it goes totally unexplained. at the very end Nathan has a thought along the lines of "who are my friends anyway" and when I read that I was like hang on... ur right. gam and prissy betray him and there's no real reconciliation. his relationship with dashini seems to be one of convenience for both characters. I think Pheby wanted to make Nathan this like really pensive and solitary kid so he doesn't really say much ever at the expense of his relationships with people because he just like.... doesn't really talk to anybody that much. the hero needs helpers and friends on his journey. that's part of a good story. and this one is absolutely missing it.
I feel like I have written a lot so im gonna stop now loll. but yeah anyway this was kind of underwhelming. idk what all the people who praised it on the front cover read but it surely couldn't have been the same book as me.
The Shadow King by Maaza Mengiste
3.0
reading this book was such a strange experience. it took me a really long time to get into and i don't really understand why because it has every element that i usually care a lot about in fiction, meaning concept, writing style, and pace. i actually bought this book for my secret santa at work and thought the plot was so interesting and unique that i ended up buying myself a copy too. the writing is very, very poetic, which im usually a huge fan of, though i think maaaaybe this is part of what made it tough to get into because there were areas where i was quite confused about what plot detail i was supposed to have grasped. it's also super slow-paced which, again, is something i really love in a book, but combined with the confusion i think it just took a while for me to discover why i was reading it in the first place.
(one thing that consistently irritated me throughout the entire thing, though, that i HAVE to mention is the lack of quotation marks. im sorry to be so harsh, but i hate it when authors do this. it adds absolutely nothing to the story. it's not quirky or minimalistic or cute. it makes the book difficult to read. punctuation is not optional? it's literally just bad grammar.)
anyway, overall i ended up loving it. mid-way through (ish) i caught on to the whole vibe and read most of the second half in one sitting. it's so so so beautifully written and i loved the main character, Hirut, for her defiance and spirit and strength. definitely recommend. honestly i wouldn't be that surprised if other people had no trouble with it at all. probs just me lol.
(one thing that consistently irritated me throughout the entire thing, though, that i HAVE to mention is the lack of quotation marks. im sorry to be so harsh, but i hate it when authors do this. it adds absolutely nothing to the story. it's not quirky or minimalistic or cute. it makes the book difficult to read. punctuation is not optional? it's literally just bad grammar.)
anyway, overall i ended up loving it. mid-way through (ish) i caught on to the whole vibe and read most of the second half in one sitting. it's so so so beautifully written and i loved the main character, Hirut, for her defiance and spirit and strength. definitely recommend. honestly i wouldn't be that surprised if other people had no trouble with it at all. probs just me lol.