4.5 stars ... or none, I'm not sure.

I'm one big questionmark. I was it all along. Right from the beginning. I have absolutely no idea how to rate and review this book and honestly, I think I can't. Nothing, no matter what I write, would do this justice. Maybe because this is something I haven't read before and I feel like I have to mention that. It's dark and twisted and absolutely confusing, but in a good way. Again: it's really dark. Really twisted. Really confusing ... But totally worth it, if you ask me!

"I forever tiptoed the line between light and dark, never really knowing which way 'd go."

I don't want to give too much away, therefore I can't and don't even want to talk about the plot - I think the blurb is already enough and if that intrigued you and made you curious, you should definitely get the book and read it! Just bear in mind that it's different to what you probably expect. It's a psychological thriller. No usual romance book and even though there's some kind of love in this book, you should definitely go into this without any expectations. Do not expect sweet love scenes and cute, perfect couples. It's anything but that. If you're able to forget and throw that all away, you're good. Well, as good as you can be ...

The characters were unique - there's Layna, the female main character and she's ... I don't even know how to describe her. She's beautiful, fascinating and mysterious but also disturbing and kind of creepy. I can't even say if I liked her or not ... I wouldn't even want to connect with her, to be honest. And Elian, the male main character, is handsome, cute and outgoing. At first. I really liked him and also felt everything he went through ... it's just horrible. This book also really shows how many different sides a person can have and that they're not all good. It's scary, true and makes you think about that a lot. And also about love. Like I mentioned above there's a little "love" story in the book but it's completely different to what I/you usually read. And it scares me. I mean, it's just so freaking weird. All consuming love. And I wonder if that could ever be a good thing - probably not.

"Her eyes gave her away. Dark and wide and bottomless. Coal black. They were sad and devoid of light. But I knew there was a soul inside there somewhere.
Or at least I hoped so."

I loved the writing style a lot! It was beautifully written, really gripping and freaked me out at the same time! In general, the book was unputdownable and I caught myself reading till 3am in the morning. I didn't want to stop. I'm glad this book is a stand-alone and ended without a cliffhanger because I don't think I would be able to read another book like this anytime soon. Just nope. It messed with my head and made me feel really strange things and I'm not sure if I liked that - I'm actually really torn about my rating, maybe it would have been better to not rate it at all, but I also liked it, so I don't know.

"There's contradiction in solitude."

I would still recommend this! You have to be open-minded and would need to be able to forget about any expectations or rules you have set for yourself. If you can do this and you want to read something completely different, do it! Read it and form your own opinion!

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