It’s very well written but very dark and leaves one feeling sad after each session. Still the air of mystery drives one to continue on to see what develops. I think the beginning is potentially more jarring than the end - when things start to make sense a little bit. 

It’s not clearly defined but I assume this is what schizophrenia feels like? And it’s definitely a frightening experience to not know what’s real.

Summary for myself so I don’t forget

The story starts with what I assume is a hallucination or nightmare - the author defines them as night terrors. She’s awake but probably not awake because she wakes up in a body bag. 

The whole book feels like a series of vignettes and it’s not always clear what the timeline is of all these events. The memorable part is where she thinks she stabbed someone to death in a dark elevator because of her schizophrenia induced fear. She shows up to a dinner party a fucking mess - she thinks she is covered in blood but she’s not, just her own urine. There is a guy there who starts to take care of her. His name is Dylan and he seems to be a bit on the spectrum of being clinically insane also. They end up having a relationship and then he ghosts her - like basically disappears. Then at the end of the book you find out that they are both together (I think) and have changed their names but she doesn’t really remember most of it and I don’t even know if he really exists or is just in her imagination.