The only thing I knew about this book when I added it to my TBR was that everyone was posting videos of themselves being completely emotionally destroyed while reading it. I’m a sucker for a sad story, so of course I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. 

I can confirm that you will in fact be emotionally destroyed while reading this book. What poor Jude has had to go through… I found myself absolutely hysterically sobbing for the first time

about halfway through the book

on New Year’s Eve. Who wants to go out on New Year’s Eve when instead you can play powerwash simulator while listening to an audiobook that absolutely crushes your heart? Then I started to get numb to the sadness/horrors of the book… until we got towards the end where something I maybe should have seen coming but didn’t happened and I was crushed all over again. And then the absolute ending crushed me for a third time. 

My heart hurts. But it was a very good 

I made a couple of commentary notes while reading…

- 45% as I sit here crying over what is happening to Jude, the thought “omg why is the author doing this to him it’s awful” crossed my mind. But really why am I surprised? That’s the selling point of this book. The tragic sadness. I have a feeling this is going to wind up being nothing compared to the truly sad points of this book. 
- 87% did this author really just fucking kill Willem. I’m not sad right now. I am furious. I am so mad.