i have ten billion thoughts and i’m broken inside and i’m unsure if i’m going to survive the emotional turmoil and joy of this series. more rambling than an actual review yet again, but here it is nonetheless!

I’m obsessed with Opal and Henry and I need a book that’s just Gansey and Blue and Henry on their gap year adventures and then I need another one where they join back up with Ronan and Adam and Opal and everyone is happy and nobody splits up and Noah—

My darling Noah. I can’t stand the loss of him. I love him so much and it aches to think that he’ll never get the happy ending that everyone else in this book gets.

And, speaking of happy endings: Ronan and Adam!! Finally! I adore them. I love how they argue and how they understand each other and yearn for each other. Steifvater’s writing is perfectly suited to my favorite troupes—that chapter where Adam’s hands are possessed and trying to kill Ronan, and all he can do is beg his loved ones to fight back before he kills the man he loves and hurts them all in the process? Good GOD I ate that shit up.

Also, Persephone!! She makes me sob. Adam’s “I miss you” to her will literally keep me up at night. The longing that Maura and Calla feel for her, the inclusion of Maura and Calla and Persephone’s first meeting; it all aches.

And on Maura: I need more of her!! I need a slice-of-life Fox Way story where she navigates life with the usual suspects plus Gwenllian, and of course where the Gray Man is with her and they’re stupidly in love because I love them so much and I can’t stand that I don’t get to see whether or not they have their happy ending. (And yes, that may be the point and I love it, but my heart still hurts).

Finally, Declan, my love. Every time he shows up my heart just shatters even more. I love him.