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A review by mspilesofpaper
Audited By The Anubis by Wendi Gogh
lighthearted
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
1.0
Fern is being audited by the IRS in the form of an Anubis since she hasn't filed her taxes for two years. Shenanigans happen, and they suddenly fake dating to keep Fern's mother and her ex-husband away. How long is it fake, though?
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
Audited by the Anubis is a paranormal romance set in the USA where monsters exist very openly. It plays in a fictional small town (with the most stereotypical name that I can't remember behind something with Cedar and Heights because the MMC complained that there's no mountain nearby). It's the first in a series, and we meet two other monsters who will play a role in some later book.
Normally, I would talk about the characters here before saying anything else, but I have to jump directly to the "What the fuck?" stage because the book is a clusterfuck. When I read the summary on Amazon, I was like: "Oh yes, another kind of monster and not just werewolves, fae or shifters again", because I had never seen an Anubis as an MMC prior to this novel. Unfortunately, the book is 100% a mess.
🡢 No world-building beyond the "There's another universe/world which can be entered only by monsters.", the mention that the story plays in the USA and that Anubis do origin in Egypt and are loosely based on the Death God Anubis. Why does Anhou refer to Osiris regularly? How did the Anubis (as monsters) came to be? Why are there monsters in the world in general? When did it happen? I could go on because the author drops plot details with no explanation or background.
🡢 The sex was utterly gross. It's based on a dom/sub relationship (both are switches) until suddenly the A/O/B stuff comes into play but there's also no explanation for it aside from "Yeah, I am an Alpha, which is why I have those cock marks". Uh, great? Also, calling a woman's arousal as slick is gross (though it suddenly made sense with the A/O/B stuff) but it's even worse when he licks a puddle of it off the floor. And why did a ghost (an old woman) watch him masturbate and why is he ok with it? (In general: why are people ok with ghosts?!)
🡢 The villains (the mother and the ex-husband) have awful explanations to be evil. Why did one suddenly do arson out of nowhere? Why are they ok with the chance to kill someone? Why does the ex-husband want her back (after being separated/divorced for nearly two years)? Why does the mother want her daughter to get back with the ex?
🡢 Why is the FMC so stupid? She doesn't trust her mother at all because her mother is abusive and bad with money. Yet, the mother is in charge of Fern's business accounts and does her taxes? All because Fern is dyslexic? Also, I am dyslexic. No, dyslexia doesn't work like it does in the book. Words don't dance around the page when we read. DO YOUR FUCKING RESEARCH IF YOU USE A DISABILITY FOR YOUR CHARACTER! How did she even run a bakery so successfully if she cannot read at all and while her mother was embezzling from her?
🡢 Why was there a fake dating trope when they were into each other from the start, they were aware of it and are ok with it? Seriously, the trope didn't add anything to the plot and felt like the author had to shoehorn it into it, so they have the trope for marketing.
🡢 All the fucking trauma dumped onto the reader chapter after chapter. I was close to throwing my Kindle across the room when the FMC died. All the fatphobia is also exhausting. She's constantly described as clearly plus size. Why the cover art doesn't portray it (besides big boobs) is a mystery for the ages.
🡢 The story is constantly told between her POV and his POV but both POVs repeat stuff from the previous chapter told by the other POV. I should have stopped after the second chapter.
TL;DR: Just don't read it. It's already my worst book of the year read and it's just mid January.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
TWs & CWs: oral and vaginal sex, internalised fatphobia, fatphobia from mother and ex-partner, dom/sub, A/O/B, knotting, breeding kink, masturbation, voyeurism, discussion of food shaming, boob sex, sex with food involved (whipped cream and sauces), no condom, mating, death of the FMC, mentions of blood
Trope(s): fake dating
Genre: Paranormal Romance, Monster Romance
Heat/Spice: 2.5 🌶️(gross and utterly repetitive)
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
Audited by the Anubis is a paranormal romance set in the USA where monsters exist very openly. It plays in a fictional small town (with the most stereotypical name that I can't remember behind something with Cedar and Heights because the MMC complained that there's no mountain nearby). It's the first in a series, and we meet two other monsters who will play a role in some later book.
Normally, I would talk about the characters here before saying anything else, but I have to jump directly to the "What the fuck?" stage because the book is a clusterfuck. When I read the summary on Amazon, I was like: "Oh yes, another kind of monster and not just werewolves, fae or shifters again", because I had never seen an Anubis as an MMC prior to this novel. Unfortunately, the book is 100% a mess.
🡢 No world-building beyond the "There's another universe/world which can be entered only by monsters.", the mention that the story plays in the USA and that Anubis do origin in Egypt and are loosely based on the Death God Anubis. Why does Anhou refer to Osiris regularly? How did the Anubis (as monsters) came to be? Why are there monsters in the world in general? When did it happen? I could go on because the author drops plot details with no explanation or background.
🡢 The sex was utterly gross. It's based on a dom/sub relationship (both are switches) until suddenly the A/O/B stuff comes into play but there's also no explanation for it aside from "Yeah, I am an Alpha, which is why I have those cock marks". Uh, great? Also, calling a woman's arousal as slick is gross (though it suddenly made sense with the A/O/B stuff) but it's even worse when he licks a puddle of it off the floor. And why did a ghost (an old woman) watch him masturbate and why is he ok with it? (In general: why are people ok with ghosts?!)
🡢 The villains (the mother and the ex-husband) have awful explanations to be evil. Why did one suddenly do arson out of nowhere? Why are they ok with the chance to kill someone? Why does the ex-husband want her back (after being separated/divorced for nearly two years)? Why does the mother want her daughter to get back with the ex?
🡢 Why is the FMC so stupid? She doesn't trust her mother at all because her mother is abusive and bad with money. Yet, the mother is in charge of Fern's business accounts and does her taxes? All because Fern is dyslexic? Also, I am dyslexic. No, dyslexia doesn't work like it does in the book. Words don't dance around the page when we read. DO YOUR FUCKING RESEARCH IF YOU USE A DISABILITY FOR YOUR CHARACTER! How did she even run a bakery so successfully if she cannot read at all and while her mother was embezzling from her?
🡢 Why was there a fake dating trope when they were into each other from the start, they were aware of it and are ok with it? Seriously, the trope didn't add anything to the plot and felt like the author had to shoehorn it into it, so they have the trope for marketing.
🡢 All the fucking trauma dumped onto the reader chapter after chapter. I was close to throwing my Kindle across the room when the FMC died. All the fatphobia is also exhausting. She's constantly described as clearly plus size. Why the cover art doesn't portray it (besides big boobs) is a mystery for the ages.
🡢 The story is constantly told between her POV and his POV but both POVs repeat stuff from the previous chapter told by the other POV. I should have stopped after the second chapter.
TL;DR: Just don't read it. It's already my worst book of the year read and it's just mid January.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
TWs & CWs: oral and vaginal sex, internalised fatphobia, fatphobia from mother and ex-partner, dom/sub, A/O/B, knotting, breeding kink, masturbation, voyeurism, discussion of food shaming, boob sex, sex with food involved (whipped cream and sauces), no condom, mating, death of the FMC, mentions of blood
Trope(s): fake dating
Genre: Paranormal Romance, Monster Romance
Heat/Spice: 2.5 🌶️(gross and utterly repetitive)