sue me but i hated this. honestly for the life of me i couldn’t tell you why i finished this other than the fact it meant i checked something off of my reading list.

at many points this book felt like it was weird for the sake of being weird. its weirdness was pointless and felt like it was only there to shock me.

the characters all felt flat - paloma had almost no personality and felipe felt annoying. iquela was my favourite character, but honestly she had no competition and was only likeable because she made sense. most of this book does not make sense to me. i cannot tell what is real or not real or imagined or fake or what.

the plot feels barely connected, and the payout felt weak and like i had wasted my time. 

the only thing i found intriguing about this book was its historical context, but honestly nothing was ever explained and every time the past was touched on i felt so close to actually enjoying this, and then the author rips the historical context out of my grubby hands and makes me return to felipe and iquela fighting. 

this review feels so mean but im actually angry because this book had potential. at parts i did have fun. i was constantly waiting for this book to get better. it did not.

i might try and read the authors other book, namely when women kill, but honestly im so mad at this book i don’t even want to look at her other books for a while. 

im gonna go watch drag race im actually so mad

edit: omg hello how did i forget the two massive things that made me the most angry about this book. at one point “autistic” is used as an insult, and there is an incredibly graphic scene of animal cruelty for no reason! which is even harder for me to read as it was about a parrot! i lost my baby girl monty only earlier this year. i actually wanted to vomit and cry reading that. i’ll miss you forever baby girl. and fuck this book for adding unnecessary animal cruelty.