Cleavage was a Macmillan Audio pick & this book was just indescribable. From the synopsis: “What is the difference between men & women? Jennifer Finney Boylan…examines the divisions—as well as the common ground—between the genders, & reflects on her own experiences, both difficult & joyful, as a transgender American.” As a cis woman, it was interesting to see how a trans woman saw the differences between men & women. And let me tell you, she didn’t miss anything. It’s truly so disappointing that being a woman in our society comes with so much fear & acquiescence. Being a trans woman adds a component to that fear as well. But, this book was absolutely not about all of the negatives.

Jenny discusses her journey through life on so many levels: suppressing her true self, finding friendship and love, opening up to family, transitioning, raising children, & life as a woman in private & public spaces. She peppers her story with those of other trans women throughout history (from Emperor Marcus Aurelius Antoninus to sportswriter Christine Daniels) as well as personal anecdotes of interactions with various people throughout life both pre & post transition.

My favorite parts of this book are when Jenny addresses fear & hate against trans people because she is so empathetic to where a lot of fear & hate comes from, & she doesn’t speak in a confrontational manner. It takes true strength, courage, & knowledge to be patient with prejudiced people. Yet, ironically, she speaks about her own fear when her eldest child came out as a trans woman. How a part of her felt like she was “at fault” & also how she felt like maybe she wasn’t there enough for her daughter to come to her sooner. She talked about the fear she felt as a parent of a trans child and how that fear made her understand better the fear others have in regards to trans children.

“If accepting [my daughter] had been that hard for me, even given all that I know, what must parents who know nothing about these issues go through? … It makes me want to reach out to all the parents of all the transgender children in the world to let them know that their child coming out as trans is not some terrible fate, but, with a little luck, the thing that might well bring them joy & success. And also to let them know they are not bad parents for feeling an initial sense of loss. That loss, I want to tell them, is not all that you will feel. In time, you will find a new sense of pride, as your child, transformed, becomes a better version of themselves. A person whom you can admire not only for their accomplishments but for the way in which they have done the hardest thing imaginable: to have taken the risk of having their own parents turn their backs on them forever.”

Hands down, this book was 5 stars and a must read.