I'm going to be a little vulnerable for a second. A few years I was part of a ministry that really hurt me. I got hurt so bad that even thinking about it now makes me tear up, and I'm not a crier. After that, I went through a long season of being lost, broken, and bitter. I was trying to keep my relationship with God together the best I could, but it was so hard because the people who showed me the goodness and love of God was no longer in my life. They were gone in an instant, and it felt like God left with them. I began questioning how authentic the relationships were before the downfall, if God really cared, and if I even wanted to do this whole God thing anymore. And honestly, deep down, my answer was no. But I kept trying to fight not for myself but for the people who looked up to me. For my sister and my mom (who doesn't have the best relationship with God). For the girls that I had discipled over the years. I fought for everyone but myself, but I still was fighting.

Here recently God has came in and wrecked my life in the best way possible. I have found new christian friends, a church I feel comfortable in, and am working on growing my relationship with Jesus every day. One of my friends gave me this book to read, and it happened to be about church hurt. I'm not saying reading this book was a heal all situation, but it opened my eyes, and now, with the help of God and some great people, I can begin to start the healing process. Being bitter is a bigger burden than what you realize. It weighs you down. But this is me fighting. This is me getting out of that painful, season.

If anyone is struggling with church hurt or have bitterness towards an old friend, I recommend reading this book.