It can be quite easy, as a white person, to just ignore conversations about race and racism when they become uncomfortable. But as DiAngelo shows us in "White Fragility," this is how we participate in and perpetuate systemic racism in our daily lives—by avoiding the topic altogether.

It is sometimes difficult but absolutely necessary to hear and reflect on DiAngelo's call for her fellow white people to think about their position in a racist society. Some (even much) of what she explains about white people's reactions to race are things I'd never consciously thought about, but are just ingrained in me because I'm privileged to not have to think about race constantly. The most important point of the book, to me, was the way she asks us to reframe the way we think about racism and racist acts. We think of racism as conscious and deliberate, believing that if we do not *actively* display racism, say racist things, or discriminate then we of course cannot be racist and are therefore removed from the problem. And this thinking plays into white fragility—when we are accused (not even always as individuals, but as a collective) of playing a part in racism or doing/saying something racist, we see it as a personal and offensive attack because we see racism as a choice. And we prioritize our sensitivity, shutting down any constructive conversation.

But as DiAngelo emphasizes, racism is in fact so deeply rooted because it is often unconscious—we are all part of it, because we were born and socialized within a system that is inherently racist in its structure. Of course people can be overtly racist, but as we are all part of the structural system that perpetuates racism and imbues bias, we are all responsible for checking racism and for working toward a solution. It's a fact, not an attack, that white people benefit from historical and structural racism. By understanding that we are all part of racism because of our society and socialization, we can move beyond feeling attacked whenever racism comes up and try to better identify its tendencies in ourselves, have conversations that are actually constructive, and LISTEN attentively instead of dismissing points that we deem to be personal offenses.

Her book also offered valuable insight into the flaws in "colorblind racism," or the claim that one "doesn't see color, only individuals." Though I was already aware that this stance is problematic, DiAngelo very clearly and extensively articulates how this kind of thinking is actually detrimental to progress because it erases Black experiences and the ways in which, at the societal level, races *are* seen and treated differently. She also offered the insight that claiming to be "colorblind" is a lie, because it is impossible in the context of a racist society to ignore race. Even if you think you are, you aren't. Again, she emphasizes that ignoring racial difference is muting our different experiences, a tactic that makes progress impossible and discussion meaningless.

This book was extremely helpful for me in forcing me to consider why white people are so sensitive about discussing racism and to recognize how I can stop centering my own feelings and experience. It's not easy to talk about or to do, but it's necessary. It's up to us to get over ourselves, listen to Black people when they tell us their realities, and seek out the resources that will help us grow. And when we get things wrong, we must be open to feedback; if we're not, we're just spinning in circles. I write this review not only to explain what I got out of this book, but also as a place to return to if and when I'm finding myself emotionally challenged by discourse on racism. So future Kathy: get over yourself, don't get defensive, and keep listening.