There were parts of this book that I adored and parts of this book that made me really angry. It seems fitting that I'm having a hard time saying whether I have more positive or negative feelings about a book that examines life's nuances and demonstrates that so few things are truly binary. Life isn't black and white, but a whole spectrum of grays. 

The parts that I liked the most were the parts that explored identity. Identity really seemed to fuel this book. Evelyn needed to shake her born identity as Evelyn Herrara, Spanish-speaking Cuban American and resident of Hell's Kitchen. She embraced opportunism and never apologized for it in order to assume a new identity: Evelyn Hugo, English-speaking Hollywood starlet. Before the term bisexual is even used, she identifies as someone who loves men AND loves a woman. 

Likewise, Monique, the obscure writer Evelyn chooses to write her biography, is half black and half white but never feels enough of either. Identity gets lost in being not enough of anything -- or feeling that way. 

Something that really bothered me, though, was that Evelyn says she's going to tell her story now because everyone is gone. They're all dead. But the story that she tells Monique to include in her book ultimately ends up revealing very private and sensitive information about other people -- people she loved, people she hated, people she once loved, etc. They may have been part of her story, but THEIR stories weren't hers to tell. Perhaps that's the nature of Evelyn's character. She's unapologetic, but it still felt like some of those details -- particularly what she ultimately has to reveal to Monique about why she was chosen to hear Evelyn's story -- were part of someone else's story, and that maybe they never wanted the public to know. Some of the characters spent their whole lives hiding who they were. That they're dead now and it "doesn't matter" doesn't seem to excuse it. Especially because she outs people who were very close to her. 

The character I liked the most was Harry Cameron. I loved his friendship with Evelyn and how, no matter what, they looked out for each other. They were each other's family and constants. I loved how they made their family official, and I loved them with Connor. Once again, because this book explores complicated feelings and complex people, I loved everything about Harry except for when we found out about his death and how it happened. It was the most unlikeable thing about him but it was a huge thing, and that action from the past had major implications for someone in the present who never even knew Harry. 

There were many things to admire about Evelyn, and there were many things that I didn't like at all. But I think that's exactly the point the book wants to make. No one is completely this or wholly that. Everyone is a mixture of things. Some good and some bad. 

That said, I will say that I didn't love the character of Celia St. James. Or rather, the character didn't bother me so much as her relationship with Evelyn. I didn't find anything about it romantic. It felt toxic to me. Evelyn would work hard for them to be together and protect their privacy (and protect them in general with the world was even less accepting of LGBTQIA+ communities), but Celia just seemed like she was never going to be happy. Short of Evelyn giving up her dreams to do everything the way Celia wanted it to be done, Evelyn was never going to win. Not really. Celia was insecure and selfish. Evelyn was selfish too, but I didn't feel like it was to the same extent as Celia. 

I did enjoy the book and read it in giant chunks at a time. But it also gave me a lot to think about in terms of identity, binaries, women's rights, and how our own personal moral and ethical codes are formed. This is my third TJR book and it's probably the one that made me think most about the book's illuminating aspects rather than just the story itself.