When We Were Silent is the dark & intense debut novel from Fiona McPhillips which follows the life of our protagonist Louise(Lou) Manson as she relives the trauma she experienced at the hands of Coach McQueen & Highfield Manor. While attempting to get justice for herself &the many other victims which have emerged, Lou discovers there are many more secrets buried deep within the imposing granite walls of this elite private Catholic school.

Using a dual timeline through Lou’s eyes, McPhillips examines the lingering destructive nature of the trauma caused by sexual abuse. At no point does she shy away from its severity, in fact she truly allows you to sit & fester in the insipid nature of the abuse. McPhillips adeptly interweaves the stories of Lou, her mother & her daughter to harrowingly show that the abuse doesn’t just affect the victim but indeed all those around them, often causing long standing generational trauma.

Within the first few chapters & throughout, there is a pervading palpable sense of fear that does not relent. This is reinforced by characters who are truly fleshed out in all their likeable & unlikeable glory. From the sometimes questionable inner thoughts & actions of Lou & Shauna to the vile & viciously manipulative nature of McQueen, nothing is held back. It has been a long time since a book has had such a physical effect on me & I found myself in many moments where my heart was thumping in my chest & I could feel bile rising to the back of my throat.

While it is a hugely dark story, McPhillips does provide small moments of relief in the safety of the familiar through many recognisable pop culture references. I found this juxtaposition so effective in showing how life still has to go on for victims, regardless of what they are enduring.

Sadly this book holds a terrifyingly accurate mirror to what has been coming to light in Irish society in recent years & McPhillips astutely demonstrates the harsh reality of the Ireland of its time.

A profound fictional novel firmly anchored in the reality of far too many, which emphasises the importance of speaking up & having your voice heard, even if you don’t believe it will go anywhere.

If you enjoyed this review come follow me on instagram @TravelsEatsReads for more