I don't think I've read a book that has put me into such a state of anxiety than <i>Soldier Sailor</i> did for a long time. This is a bracing, honest and dark look at both the early months of motherhood, following Kilroy's unnamed narrator who is struggling to adapt to her new role as mother and homemaker, whilst her husband's life continues as normal, and her baby refuses to eat/sleep/insert other baby behaviour here.

For about 2/3s of the novel, Kilroy combines incredibly prescient writing with dark humour to paint a picture of motherhood which made me alarmed to see how many women have described this as relatable. I felt like I knew this woman so well that I wanted to punch her husband in the face, and was overjoyed when she found an ally in parenting who saw her for her rather than simply as a Mum. The final third, then, captures the joys of motherhood - the deep love that ties two people into having a baby, and peels back some of the moments we saw earlier in the novel described as times of immense pain, refreshed as being ultimately okay.

As someone who is decidedly unsure I want children, <i>Solider Sailor</i> definitely confirmed many of my anxieties about motherhood, but I am very grateful to Kilroy for capturing all of these complicated feelings so well within the pages of this novel.