I have never struggled with rating a book as much as I did this one. There are parts I find incredibly compelling, and I think the commentary on trauma and sex was nuanced in a way that I rarely see. There were multiple lines that were so profound I had to sit with them for a moment before moving on. 

However, I struggled with this book. Joan’s inner monologue went on so many tangents it was hard to remember where we started. She spends the whole book alluding to this singular moment that changed her life, but after graphic descriptions of SA, child SA, and death, it lacked the punch I think Taddeo wanted us to feel. The book was also marketed as a woman’s journey from prey to predator, and I don’t think we got that. 95% of the book is Joan stuck in her incredibly traumatic headspace, and to be blunt, I expected her to murder a lot more men than she did. For how much she talked about it, a rampage was what the book was leading up to. Perhaps her taking control one time was how she could rewrite her narrative, but I don’t think the book sold us on that. It felt unfinished. 

I don’t know if I would recommend this book to people, but I also don’t think I hated it. I mostly mourn what the book could have been.