Can I just say Becky Chambers is so goddamn good at what she does? How does that saying go? If Becky Chambers has a million fans, I am one of them . If Chambers has ten fans, I am one of them. If Chambers has only one fan, that is me. if Chambers has no fans, that means I am dead. It's so true. In this novella, Becky imagines a optimistic future, where humanity comes together to tackle the problem of climate change. That isn't enough to sway those with their eyes set on the stars, and a stateless populist organization has pulled its resources to pursue space exploration, with a true altruistic mindset of "leave no trace." 

While alien life plays an important role—this crew of four would not be in space if there weren't alien planets to explore—the heart and soul of the novel is the crew itself. The story is structured as a mission report, sent from the Lawki 6 to earth, after they have lost contact. Engineer Ariadne O'Neill is the one conveying the message on behalf of herself and her three crewmates: meteorologist Elena Quesada-Cruz, geologist Jack Vo, and biologist Chikondi Daka. 

The story is framed around an unprecedented event, so although Ari is relaying a mission, she is somewhat more personable than strictly scientific. In the beginning of the novel, when Ari says she loves her crewmates more than anyone in the universe, it's easy to write that off, but as the story progresses it becomes apparent that it is remarkably true. Ari knows her crewmates down to their souls, knowing where and how Elena prefers to sleep, can tell when Jack is nearby just by the cadence of his footsteps and spends hours with Chikondi having theoretical discussions about ethics and the meaning of life. 

The most compelling part of the novel for me, is the ending of their stay on Opera. They have been trapped in the Lawki 6 for weeks under a tumultuous ocean, and everybody's nerves are frayed. Ari, the mechanic, the engineer, whose job it is to keep everything running, tries to bolster her teammates but in turn, eventually, each rebuff her efforts. When they finally make it back into orbit, Ari has a sort of mental break, where she puts on her EVA suit and is tempted to commit suicide by drifting away into the stars. When her crewmates notice, Jack and Elena try to get her back in the spacecraft. Jack considers going after her, even with the disastrous consequences with the airlock open. But it's Chikondi—asexual, introspective, gentle Chikondi—who gets her back inside by asking her an inane question. But it's not the question that matters, it's the implicit acknowledgement that they haven't been taking care of her as well as she'd been caring for them.

Because the story is told in a mission report format, we really don't get to see any of Ari's recovery, and part of me really wanted to, but the rest of me acknowledges the perfection of this novel. 

And how I know Becky Chambers is truly a masterclass in her craft, is the choice the crew makes at the end of the novel. They are presented with what is seemingly a two-choice problem. And no matter what we would choose as the audience, our choice would ultimately be selfish. When the crew chooses a third option, an option I wouldn't have even considered, I'll admit I was taken aback. But after ruminating on that for a while, I think there would be no other ending so fitting for a novel of this caliber. 

★★★★★ the polycule in space I've been wanting stars