I don’t know how I feel except for deep pain and sadness. I almost dropped this book at the beginning thinking it was a cheap trial at sad girl smut, but it was so much more. It was a raw portrayal of a story I could’ve never imagined, such a sad and sorrowful one. I could never relate to what Joan goes through, but there were sentences and instances here and there that came out of nowhere and shed light on feelings I wished to avoid, feelings that gutted me. I’d like to believe that this book will live with me forever, but I know my brain will try to forget how traumatising it has been, but I can confidently say that the feelings I felt listening to this book, and the things I realised will be part of my soul forever.