As well as being hilariously concise, caeliniscreepy's review nailed it. Our intro to the main character is him perving on a secretary and then we get to hear his endlessly whiny, self-pitying internal monologue until he gets possessed by an evil desk and becomes a rapist. This is our protagonist who I guess we're supposed to care about? If this author is trying to rewrite The Shining, he has to do better than this. The Shining actually made you care about the wife and kid and took you along on Jack's slow burn decent into madness. The main character in this book is IMMEDIATELY possessed while his wife and college aged kids are like "weird...oh well". This book has you praying the evil desk will eat them all. As someone in my 40s, I'm as nostalgic as the next person for 80s horror, but honestly, there's a reason we've moved on from it.