I almost gave this book 3 stars. I was right there, even though it felt a bit disjointed, and was unbelievable much of the time. It was fascinating to see into the minds of the rabid fan cult. To see deep into the people who become so obsessed with a famous person, that they think they OWN that person. Erin Mayer mentioned more than a few times that these types of people want to crawl into the skin of their idol. Make their life their own. That they feel they have full power over that person's life. Truth be told, since I entered the world of KPop fandoms I understand how this can manifest. It's not hard to cross the line from fan, to obsessed.

Despite how slow this felt at times, and how much I wanted to shake some sense into our unnamed narrator, I carried on. I guess I kind of understood where she was coming from. To have nothing, to belong to nothing, and then to suddenly find meaning and belonging is a feeling that is too easy to sink deeply into without much thought. Even when she discovered that the people she was spending time with were terrible, she kept choosing them over and over. It's sad, but it's not beyond the realm of reality. I will saw though, it was so very frustrating. If that's what Mayer was going for, then it worked well.

The ending killed it for me though. All that time invested, and then the ending was just so lackluster. I almost rated this three stars, but I couldn't forgive that ending.