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A review by lolavsr
Dead Moons Rising by Jack Whitney
1.0
Let me start by saying I didn’t HATE this book. I think it had a lot of potential to be quite good if it only had been run through an editor. I fully know it’s tough work writing a novel, forget self- publishing; but this reads like a rough draft that’s been leaked.
Let me start with what I didn’t hate first. The world building in this book is what gives me hope for it. It’s easy in high fantasy to get stuck into a set location so you don’t have to explain the geography of the lands, but I was constantly impressed at how beautifully the author laid out the universe in this story.
The two main characters were also compelling. Aydra and Lex are so unlike so many other female fantasy characters. They unreservedly embrace their sexuality, are unapologetic in their strength and exemplify the bond of female friendship exemplarily.
That is where my fondness for this book ends. My primary issue with this book was in the way the subjects of rape and incest were handled. While ASOIAF is often criticised for its inclusion of the two, I do think even GRRM was more tasteful with it. Their inclusion added NOTHING to the story or character progressions. The author seemed to throw the subjects around for shock value, but honestly it added nothing but an ick factor that immediately put me off the book. I could go on about this, but you get the idea.
My next major issue was the stylistic choices. The characters diction seemed to change with each passing sentence, making for a very confusing read. I wouldn’t complain either one, but she really just had to pick ONE linguistic style and stick with it. The grammatical errors were also ATROCIOUS. I get it, I hate correcting my own grammar as much as the next person. You can get through life just fine with run on sentences, but in a novel it just sticks out like a sore thumb. Even without an editor a single run through grammarly would have remedied this.
To conclude, I would definitely be willing to give this book a second shot if it was taken through a thorough edit. The author is clearly talented and I’d be curious to say where the rest of the series goes to.
Let me start with what I didn’t hate first. The world building in this book is what gives me hope for it. It’s easy in high fantasy to get stuck into a set location so you don’t have to explain the geography of the lands, but I was constantly impressed at how beautifully the author laid out the universe in this story.
The two main characters were also compelling. Aydra and Lex are so unlike so many other female fantasy characters. They unreservedly embrace their sexuality, are unapologetic in their strength and exemplify the bond of female friendship exemplarily.
That is where my fondness for this book ends. My primary issue with this book was in the way the subjects of rape and incest were handled. While ASOIAF is often criticised for its inclusion of the two, I do think even GRRM was more tasteful with it. Their inclusion added NOTHING to the story or character progressions. The author seemed to throw the subjects around for shock value, but honestly it added nothing but an ick factor that immediately put me off the book. I could go on about this, but you get the idea.
My next major issue was the stylistic choices. The characters diction seemed to change with each passing sentence, making for a very confusing read. I wouldn’t complain either one, but she really just had to pick ONE linguistic style and stick with it. The grammatical errors were also ATROCIOUS. I get it, I hate correcting my own grammar as much as the next person. You can get through life just fine with run on sentences, but in a novel it just sticks out like a sore thumb. Even without an editor a single run through grammarly would have remedied this.
To conclude, I would definitely be willing to give this book a second shot if it was taken through a thorough edit. The author is clearly talented and I’d be curious to say where the rest of the series goes to.