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A review by visceralreads
Patron Saints of Nothing by Randy Ribay
5.0
DISCLAIMER: I'm not Fil-Am, but a pure-blooded Filipino who grew up in Singapore, so I can't talk for all the Jason Regueros out there.
This is my first fil-am book I've read and enjoyed! I actually wrote pointers for my book review but my dumbass notes app deleted it before I could save it,, so like I'm running on my pathetic memory to write this review :))
[I dont wanna be that guy who talks about themself all the time but,,, idk I feel like I have to give a little anecdote of being a filipino outside of ph and how i relate to Jay?? So, my parents always talk to me and my sibling in tagalog ever since we were still young, and they keep telling us to not be ashamed to speak our native language. But I've always been so self-conscious about talking in Tagalog, and like what Jay said: it doesn't feel right, you know? English and Tagalog is obviously different, and the feel of Tagalog words on our tongues is weird and alien. I mean, I sure have to work on it, especially that I'm now living in the Philippines, and I have to learn how to socialise and stuff. I did have some Filipino classmates back in singapore, but we only spoke english with each other so that's that.]
I have to admit I actually didnt know that much about the drug war in philippines until I moved here last 2020, and this book has also been very helpful in educating non-filipinos of the shit that's been happening in the Philippines (police brutality, drug war killings, poverty, human trafficking, drug trafficking, feeling unsafe outside alone/at night). And every word I read feels like a punch to my gut because why havent i been paying attention? I see the beggars on the street every day, children knocking on car windows to get a few coins, ride past the slums in the city, hear about people getting killed in plain sight by some guy (usually with a badge) and a gun, etc. Gising na PH. Wake up, Philippines.
So uhh,, on to the things I love in this book: The bits of tagalog in there, the whole session with Reyna and Mia in bisaya (my mom's side is from Zamboanga), seeing Philippines in the eyes of a returning filipino (nostalgia even though I live here!! the weird ass traffic system, sari-sari stores in the barangays, SM malls, etc.), and idk if this is intentional, but the My Way frank sinatra karaoke scene is actually a clever reference to the My Way killings and gave me literal goosebumps lmaoo
Jay's whole journey in this mystery/loss/grief is a great read, poetic and flowed really nicely. I even teared up at Jun's memorial thingy especially when tito maning eventually joined all of them. I'm not good at writing proper reviews and going deep into my feelings, but this shit's really heartwrenching tho,,, Jun was such a pure soul, so full of curiousity and was really wholesome. I really enjoyed reading his letters to Jay, and is it weird to say this but his writing sounds so filipino to me?? Like,, the word choices and lack of contractions make his letters very authentic,,,??? I really don't know how to describe it, but the way the filipinos speak in this book really sound like how I hear people speak english here. The accent is so subtle, yet so distinct.
I also loved how the chapter titles are the final words of each chapter, and I noticed how the chapter titles are found a few sentences before the final line towards the end of the book (i think it has to mean something, but I honestly can't think of anything,, I'm sorry)
The wlw relationships in this book really made me believe in hope that there's someone who'll love and accept me no matter what, especially in a country that's one of the most gay-friendly yet homophobic countries in the world. The lesbian couples are portrayed so positively, so casually, and I really love that!!
The only problems i have with this book is the hint(ing) of romance between mia and jay?? I know that 19 and 17 ain't that big a deal for most people, but the age gap (and jay's essentially a minor!) made me very uncomfortable. And the pacing too, I felt like it ended rather abruptly and felt a little,, empty?
(sorry talaga, pero I'm really bad at explaining stuff :(( sana ma-gets nyo ung point ko hahaha)
5 stars (major goosebumps)
This is my first fil-am book I've read and enjoyed! I actually wrote pointers for my book review but my dumbass notes app deleted it before I could save it,, so like I'm running on my pathetic memory to write this review :))
[I dont wanna be that guy who talks about themself all the time but,,, idk I feel like I have to give a little anecdote of being a filipino outside of ph and how i relate to Jay?? So, my parents always talk to me and my sibling in tagalog ever since we were still young, and they keep telling us to not be ashamed to speak our native language. But I've always been so self-conscious about talking in Tagalog, and like what Jay said: it doesn't feel right, you know? English and Tagalog is obviously different, and the feel of Tagalog words on our tongues is weird and alien. I mean, I sure have to work on it, especially that I'm now living in the Philippines, and I have to learn how to socialise and stuff. I did have some Filipino classmates back in singapore, but we only spoke english with each other so that's that.]
I have to admit I actually didnt know that much about the drug war in philippines until I moved here last 2020, and this book has also been very helpful in educating non-filipinos of the shit that's been happening in the Philippines (police brutality, drug war killings, poverty, human trafficking, drug trafficking, feeling unsafe outside alone/at night). And every word I read feels like a punch to my gut because why havent i been paying attention? I see the beggars on the street every day, children knocking on car windows to get a few coins, ride past the slums in the city, hear about people getting killed in plain sight by some guy (usually with a badge) and a gun, etc. Gising na PH. Wake up, Philippines.
So uhh,, on to the things I love in this book: The bits of tagalog in there, the whole session with Reyna and Mia in bisaya (my mom's side is from Zamboanga), seeing Philippines in the eyes of a returning filipino (nostalgia even though I live here!! the weird ass traffic system, sari-sari stores in the barangays, SM malls, etc.), and idk if this is intentional, but the My Way frank sinatra karaoke scene is actually a clever reference to the My Way killings and gave me literal goosebumps lmaoo
Jay's whole journey in this mystery/loss/grief is a great read, poetic and flowed really nicely. I even teared up at Jun's memorial thingy especially when tito maning eventually joined all of them. I'm not good at writing proper reviews and going deep into my feelings, but this shit's really heartwrenching tho,,, Jun was such a pure soul, so full of curiousity and was really wholesome. I really enjoyed reading his letters to Jay, and is it weird to say this but his writing sounds so filipino to me?? Like,, the word choices and lack of contractions make his letters very authentic,,,??? I really don't know how to describe it, but the way the filipinos speak in this book really sound like how I hear people speak english here. The accent is so subtle, yet so distinct.
I also loved how the chapter titles are the final words of each chapter, and I noticed how the chapter titles are found a few sentences before the final line towards the end of the book (i think it has to mean something, but I honestly can't think of anything,, I'm sorry)
The wlw relationships in this book really made me believe in hope that there's someone who'll love and accept me no matter what, especially in a country that's one of the most gay-friendly yet homophobic countries in the world. The lesbian couples are portrayed so positively, so casually, and I really love that!!
The only problems i have with this book is the hint(ing) of romance between mia and jay?? I know that 19 and 17 ain't that big a deal for most people, but the age gap (and jay's essentially a minor!) made me very uncomfortable. And the pacing too, I felt like it ended rather abruptly and felt a little,, empty?
(sorry talaga, pero I'm really bad at explaining stuff :(( sana ma-gets nyo ung point ko hahaha)
5 stars (major goosebumps)