damn. This book put me through a lot and I let it.

This book basically follows these two people who have known each other since they were young and we see glimpses of their relationship at different points whenever they meet over the years. That's it. That really is the only thing that goes on. Despite that, it wasn't the reason that I wasn't obsessed with the story by the time I finished it. I have decided that in totality, I guess I did like portions of it for what it was.

This was going to be a 5 star book for the first 70% and I was completely in love but then the ending 30% was so frustrating.... I am sorry but the ending really ruined this book for me. It wasn't because I think that the story was pointless or that nothing happened but as a reader... it was just incredibly unsatisfying and, I'm going to say it again, frustrating. I don't care if it's a sad ending, I just want to feel contented.

It's frustrating and it's messy, I know. And I get that this is supposed to be real life and sometimes it's just like that but... I needed something satisfying and that's not what it was. I honestly understand how this can be so polarizing to read and even until now I don't exactly know if I can say whether I like this book or want to throw it off a cliff (note: I have since changed my mind and decided that I do want to keep it on my shelf and not sink it in the ocean).

All I can say is: this book lives up to its title. It's about normal people and it both balks me and has me in awe.

Although it didn't really bother me, you need to give it some focus in the beginning in order to understand the story due to the lack of quotation marks and brain processing power to decipher the time skips. To be honest, I did like the format because it made the flow more natural to me. However, if you are already having a hard time getting into the story, I see how it could just add to the frustration.

Marianne and Connell aren't perfect people, they frustrate each other, the people around them, me and you as the readers.... it's full of miscommunication and toxicity at times... but it's real. And it's complicated. And let's face it, that's how a lot of people are, maybe even you and me at some point in our lives and maybe people we have loved as well. But that doesn't mean that I necessarily liked how certain themes and scenarios were portrayed in this story without being given proper closures and solutions.

“Life offers up these moments of joy despite everything,”

I do stick by my earlier statement that I do not like how this book ended despite loving a majority of it. At the end of the day, I think that whether or not you like this book will depend on what you want from it. What I can tell you is that, to me, this isn’t a happy love story that made me hopeful about love… which is not my kind of story, I like to think.

— 3.5 —
⇢ content warnings// Abuse (physical, emotional), Alcohol use, Anxiety, Bullying, Death, Death of a parent (past), Depression, Domestic violence, Drug use, Sexual assault, Suicide ideation, Suicide, Toxic relationships, Violence