Sigh. I really, really wanted to like this book. Read that blurb. Doesn’t it sound fantastic? I was so incredibly excited to read this, and even though it was generally a solid read (the audiobook reader, Joel Leslie, did a fantastic job) there were so many things that irked me, rubbed me the wrong way, and kept me from enjoying it.

Although this book promised it would talk about gender identity/expression in gay men, and some parts of this were handled thoughtfully, which is partially why I was willing to give the book three stars, this book was also very, very focused in skinny, cis, white gay men. Nearly every character in this book is queer, but Thornton refused to consider any identity outside of the gay/straight binary. Where were the trans people at the gay bar where Lionel works (apart from the straight cis drag queen)? Where were the bi people? Where were the people of colour? Where were the people who were anything but white, gay, and cis? The only character of colour in this book was Lionel’s best friend Carlos, who was mostly just a supporting prop for Lionel and didn’t get to be a character unto himself. Also, the book fell into that one trope I really hate where a character who doesn’t speak English as their first language fumbles an English proverb or saying and it’s funny because their English is bad. Ha-ha. Immigrants are so funny. *facedesk*

And although they were brief, there were a few moments that left a bad taste in my mouth, including a line where Lionel makes fun of a gay retail worker’s weight and another where the members of Dog’s softball team talked about whether or not the drag queen at the bar is “really” trans and “has earned the right” to be called by the right pronouns, which I don’t think you need me to tell you is absolutely disgusting. This last moment was kind of questioned in Dog’s internal monologue, but not as much as it should have been and it was never addressed again.

Along with that (!) was a constant focus on the “right way of being gay.” Dog is criticised and mocked for not having come out to his homophobic family, he is belittled by Lionel for having slept with a woman before he figured out his identity, and he then becomes gay “properly” by coming out, and even that was handled poorly. After Dog’s ex-girlfriend accidentally outs him to his sister, his sister immediately outs Dog against his will to their mother because she’s a gossip and can’t keep a secret with no regard for Dog’s comfort levels or safety (I despised Dog’s sister). Although his mother takes it well and I actually really liked her, Dog is then pressured into coming out to his extremely homophobic father and this is treated as something he needs to do to get the stamp on his gay passport.

This book had one major saving grace, though, and it came in the form of Dog. Dog is a big part of why I gave this book the three stars it probably didn’t deserve. I loved Dog to pieces. Even though he messed up a lot I understood where he was coming from and was rooting for him to do better. He was a himbo and therefore utterly stole my heart more than I expected was possible, honestly. I’m sorry Dog honey, you deserve to be in a better book.