Sometimes I wonder how I'd be different if I'd been a successful cis-dude athlete. I'd probably be a major d-bag. Or if I sucked, I probably would have gone on to become a sad government lawyer.

It was only after choosing to transition that I wanted anything from this life, that I was able to choose anything, to commit, to achieve. I was adrift before that, a ghost ship floating on a dark sea. In choosing to transition, I was choosing to live, and choosing to be the captain of my ship, to inhabit it. In choosing to transition, I made a powerful discovery: I am the only person responsible for my life. Despite where I come from, how I grew up, what I've been through, what has happened to me — what happens next is my responsibility.