I think it's safe to say I've never read a book like that and i don't think I ever will again. At first what shone through the bleak mood was the humor. It was very prominent in her nature. The representation of mental illness is encapturing and, at least I think so, relatable. She was simply very relatable, from the way she talked to the way she thought and acted. She thought about very menial things and her thought process was bite-sized which uncannily resembles the true human thought pattern. Her thoughts weren't groundbreaking because how often do we have groundbreaking thoughts? Everytime i stopped reading i felt it pull me towards it so I think i can legally call it a page-turner. I also appreciate the lesbian representation which was done gracefully, it was a normal part about her personality and she's had girlfriends but she obviously faces homophobia. What she felt (or didn't feel) towards Giuseppe was extremely realistic. The writing style was repetitive but I deemed it fitting because Gildas thoughts spiral and repeat themselves. However what truly convinced me of the book and made me fall in love with it was the last 50 pages or so. I think it added to the tension that I wanted to finish the book before midnight which put me under some time pressure (I did it though). It was palpable and gripping. On her brink of insanity, a moment of clarity with the letters and so much confusion. An ongoing existential crisis starting at page one and climaxing at the end. I adored how everything came together in the end and I loved loved loved her mentioning the mouth thing because while reading I always thought to myself "what's her deal with looking at people's mouths?"

I know it's odd for me to praise the book so passionately and then not give it 5 stars but I thought Gilda was kind of cringe at times (like when she kept asking people if they think about space. Like, yeah. You are the only person to think about space. Out of 8 billion people.) And I thought the book was going in circles a bit. That may not be a lot but it still made it not worthy of 5 stars to me. Regardless, it's a stunning book