Why you may not like this book: This is a pretty weird book. There is definitely some of that strangeness that comes into focus and feels more symbolic, but there are elements of it that also just remain part of the general weirdness of the book.

On top of all of that, it is a book that tackles difficult topics and felt (at least to me) very tragic and without a sense of hope outside of that tragedy. That felt true to what it was representing, sure, but doesn't make it easier to digest as a reading experience. As a sort of topical book, if you are someone who tends not to enjoy topical or like "after school special" type books, this is probably not for you.

Spoiler

There is a bit in here that kind of felt hazy to me in terms of how much it was connecting bullying and the resulting violence. I think more than anything, it left out things about racism and white supremacy that felt like elephants in the room of the epidemic of gun violence. It honestly feels like I'm still processing that part of the story.

It ends in a rather open way, so fans of tidy endings beware. The writing style is simple, straightforward and without much adornment.

And finally, the story itself is told in alternating micro-chapters, showing us flashes of the characters past and moments in her present. It creates a somewhat choppy and almost frenetic style.

Some of these content warnings may be considered spoiler-y, so while I don't usually, I'm putting them behind spoiler tags:

Spoiler

bullying, cyber bullying, violence, knife violence, gun violence, blood, murder, body horror, self-harm, mutilation, hangings, homophobia

Why I liked this book: I love weird books, especially ones that use that weirdness to explore some deeper theme or meaning. I felt like while this will most certainly be a polarizing book, I think it effectively does what it set out to do.

The short chapters create their own momentum and I essentially read this in one sitting. I did have to take one break, but it was because I got to a place where I was a little overwhelmed by my own feelings of foreboding.

I think a big make it or break it element here is how much you invest in Cat and whether or not you can relate to or empathize with her experiences of isolation and loneliness and bullying. I did. It kind of hit me all at once, towards the climax of the story, how much I managed to invest in Cat as a character. And because I did, that made the exploration of bullying and growing up and finding herself poignant. I felt all her frustrations and hopes and wins and losses.

I'm scare to overhype this in the emotional gut-punch department, especially since I'm a self-professed cry baby, but this one got me in the feels. I had to just sit and be sad for a while after I read it.

I really appreciated the project of this. It's a book I've been thinking about since I finished it and will certainly be one of the more memorable reading experience of this year.