TLDR: If you’ve ever wondered why your relationships pan out the way they do (or why they fall apart), Attached is a fantastic resource. It’s equal parts enlightening and empowering, and it’s perfect for anyone who wants to better understand themselves, their partners, and how attachment theory impacts our love lives. Just keep in mind that some of the perspectives might feel a little one-sided. 

 

This book was such an eye-opener for me. Attached helped me understand so much about my ex’s behavior and why he showed up in the relationship the way he did. More importantly, it helped me realize that our breakup—no matter how painful it was—had everything to do with him and his attachment style, and nothing to do with me personally. That perspective shift? Absolutely game-changing. 

 

Reading this also gave me the tools to reflect on my own attachment style. I’ve always leaned a little more anxiously attached, but I’m proud of how much I’ve been working on showing up in more secure ways. This book offered great insights on how to be a better partner in future relationships and how to set the groundwork for healthier dynamics moving forward. 

 

That said, I couldn’t give this the full five stars. While I appreciated the deep dive into attachment theory and the nuanced way it approached anxious and secure attachment, I couldn’t help but feel that avoidantly attached individuals got the short end of the stick here. The book often painted them as “the problem” or even the enemy, and I wish it had extended the same grace and understanding to avoidant behaviors as it did to anxious ones. Relationships are complicated, and no single attachment style should carry all the blame.