This is SUCH a useful guide for navigating any relationships, let alone polyamorous/CNM ones. Fern gives a great overview on attachment styles and polyamory, and then uses both of those topics to frame how best to approach relationships. The advice in these books would be beyond useful for monogamous folks too, but it becomes even more important when engaging in multiple relationships. The book help give me some terminology and labels which were useful for navigating the space and discussions with people I was interested in. This is a *must read* for anyone looking to engage in any form of CNM! Particularly the distinction between polyamory as a lifestyle and polyamory as an orientation - that distinction was an important one to recognize in my mind.