I almost didn't rate it because I hated the story and would not recommend... but the writing was at times poignant, and I did actually finish the book (I am very quick to abandon books and feel no obligation to finish. I was really hoping for a turn in the story).

The hero hates his life, has all the signs of depression and suicidal behaviour, does not seek help nor does anyone invite him to (and the author never mentions it as an option). So instead, he plans an elaborate suicide plan that you hope will eventually remind him he has a life worth living.

No spoilers here, but every character along the way is desperate and depressed as well, leaving you to believe the best there is isn't worth much at all. It makes it seem like any silver lining is fake or manufactured, fleeting at best, and the only things real are pain, emptiness, disassociation and pointlessness. Did not love.