This is not a book i can be unbiased about. Even more so, i believe my experience with it is stunted, considering i dont speak korean, it was never published in english, and not even the korean edition can be found or purchased anymore for less than $250, as it wasnt published by, you know, a publishing house. I believe the original book has pictures and the like, so my reading of it (from somebody who translated it unoficially) was incomplete, though im sure, better than nothing.

That said, i wish it was published by traditional means, and that it could reach a bigger audience rather than be a coveted collectors piece, because it's genuinely good fiction. Its more of a novella than a novel, i believe, or a short story, and its... hard to describe? Its one of those stories where nothing really happens and you just watch people exist in the world, which is honestly my favorite genre, so im even biased on that front. But i think its beautifully written, in a very lyrical way obviously. Its hard to read as a fan, hits in several places that hurt for several reasons, but it helps in keeping him alive and close.

It feels genuine, maybe excessively so. I feel like had i read this when he was alive, i would have poked a little healthy fun at how he inserted himself into the story. Would have called it an ego thing. In retrospect, i wonder if this is just how he wanted or hoped to be seen, and i hope he knows that yeah, pretty much, thats how we see him still.

I think its also interesting that he wrote a story about missing people and then forgetting them, and now we're here, stuck missing him and doing everything in our power not to forget. I miss him everyday, and the wound is never any less raw. Today, it hurts a little more than other days. Tomorrow, it may be better.

Hurting just a little, missing you very, very much.