something is pushing me away from giving this book a full 5* but i don't know what it is.

it's one of the saddest books I've read but somehow it didn't make me cry? which was weird since i'm a big crybaby especially when it comes down to lgbt+ tragic stories. 

the themes of the book very much reminded me of the tv show Pose, which definitely made me love it even more. the themes are really heavy aka HIV, it's a thing you have to learn about and not be ignorant towards it. the book gives a great perspective from a few sides - the protagonist, his sister and his mother. that really made the book feel more real - we get different views of people reacting to the sickness but also from their eyes we also get other characters' opinions and beliefs. it's so hurtful and honestly heartbreaking to think that there was a time and people (even now) who are so goddamn homophobic and vicious towards gays. i think that's the first book about AIDS that i've read but it really felt so close to me. in my country that theme is very(!!) taboo and we never hear about the gays in the 80s or 90s out here simply because there were different times, times of communism. i'm saying that because i can't exactly relate or feel THAT close to the topic but this book opened my eyes a little more to it. i can't also say that i am completely ignorant about HIV (i blame that on my queerness throughout the years) but as i said, not a thing that is common or known here so it was good for me to read/hear a very realistic point of view of Brian and his pretty shitty family (except Letty. ily, Letty, mwah!).

it's really a book that EVERYONE should read, queer or not. it's simply human nature to be nice to people no matter what their sexual orientation is. just read the book, take notes and be better towards other people. especially the gays!