This is going to be a rant review. If you liked this book I’m happy for you, I truly am. But if you chose to read this review knowing I hated it that’s on you.

Ok.

I have... questions.

Number one.

Miss Maas, I’d just like to know, in what way was this adult fantasy? Forcing your characters to utter a swear word with a smirk or a growl every other time anyone speaks and describing everyone like a satirical r/menwritingwomen meme does not an adult novel make. This read like a hormonal teenager’s fan fic of about 14 different fantasy worlds cobbled together with their new favourite four letter words. No adult in the history of this godforsaken planet has used the word “alphahole” unironically. Or ever. Please make it end.

Two.

This book was WAY TOO LONG. Why was it so long??? When I’m being told to hold out past PAGE 500 to get to the good part we have a problem, Houston. I’ve read 100-page novellas with more substance than this entire tome. Also, while the ending was arguably much better than the beginning or middle, it was not nearly good enough to make up for the cringe-fest that was the first several hundred pages of slow brain-numbing torture.

Three.

I know I already brought this up, but the r/menwritingwomen vibes are STRONG with this one. What the actual f*ck, Maas?? I don’t need to know how perfectly formed our protagonist’s ass is every time she’s in a scene. I don’t care that Hunt’s muscles muscle muscle-y every time he does literally anything. Why am I forced to endure this.

Here’s a quote as an example:

“But she didn’t give a shit about his dental hygiene when he looked like THAT. Muscles upon muscles upon muscles...”

Seriously. What?? I promise, humans reading this, people do, in fact, care about dental hygiene no matter how many muscles you may or may not have.

Four.

What does SJM have against using the word smile? If I read “their mouth curved upward” one more f*cking time I swear to the old gods and the new there’s gonna be blood.

Five.

What was this world? This is some of the most drawn-out info-dumpy world building I’ve read and yet we still know next to nothing about how this it all functions. There are so many species to keep up with and there’s very little to distinguish them. Angels, shapeshifters, mermaids, demons, fire sprites, vampires, werewolves, fauns, weird underwater creepy murdery things... it’s just too much. Oh. They also have cell phones and “audio mail” (‘cause I guess voicemail sounded too contemporary to belong in this oh so fantastical world??). The entire story takes place in a single city with vague occasional references to one other place. And that’s it. We learn nothing about the rest of the world we’re in. Cool cool cool.

Six.

Why does this book hate women so much? This book is full to the brim with slut-shaming, ageism, and objectification. The slut-shaming is portrayed as unfair, but only in our MC’s case. The slut-shaming of sex workers is fine, though. Make it make sense.

Seven.

Is SJM capable of writing a protagonist who isn’t a Mary-Sue-Chosen-One-Hottest-Woman-Alive-Most-Powerful-of-All-Beings TM?

Eight.

Why did SJM kill off the only likable character? I won’t spoil it, but if you suffered through this book you already know. Love to see the only redeemable one sacrifice themselves to save our insufferable MC.


...I could go on, really I could, but I'm just so damn tired. The token representation of POCs and LGBTQIA+ characters (check out own voices reviews for more details), the awful dialogue, the atrocious pacing, the objectification of everything that breathes, the clunky incorporation of technology, the unsettling framing of the oppressors as the heroes and the oppressed as terrorists... this was a MESS.

I'm not sure there's a figure you could pay me to make another foray into Maas' mind.