5 out of 5 stars. This book has a lot of depictions of police brutality. So if you have trauma from this, be very careful when reading this book. This is honestly an astonishing book depicting the life of a African American/black boy living in Oakland, CA and the hardships he faces as a dark skinned minority. The ending of this book perfectly sums up how injustices within the law system are still an occurrence even to this day. Nothing is resolved and another band aid is placed on a constant issue that are allowing more police to get away with illegal treatment of people and are causing more innocent POC to be hurt or harm without any proof they posed a threat to begin with. This book made me cry because it's so deep and it's a reality I've seen not just with the African American/black community but also with the latinx community. This book expresses how standing in solidarity with one another is so important. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book and would definitely recommend it to my POC who can relate and allies who are here to support us rather than trying to help because they want to be a part of our cause (yes there is a difference).

1.5 Started audio, but though read by the author himself it wasn't particularly great, so after 3/4 just skimmed the book to end. Why was this so long? Not sure if brutal editing would have redeemed this though. It's a checklist of diversity with no actual development given to any of the diverse characters, the main character is pretty (I believe unintentionally) awful and takes emotionally from all other characters, particularly the female identifying characters, and the trauma is continuous with no build, break, or resolution. Also, it feels implausible that everything happened so quickly but continuously. Had high hopes for this, but was disappointed.

The problem I have with this book is similar to the problem I have with others in the YA genre- it is too much. There is no need to tackle every single issue in one book, particularly if you are going to do it in an over the top way. It is nice to have books like this to help youth understand complicated issues but I did not like the way this story went about it.

This book is a lot. Like, really a lot. It’s so tragic, but it’s a little bit hopeful. It’s sweet, but also a nightmare. The huge cast of characters are real and distinguishable from one another. The stories of otherhood are strong and enlightening.

We are dragged behind the gritty scenes of police violence. Of under-performing schools. Of racism. The rug is pulled up and everything that has been swept underneath is exposed.

Like real life, this book doesn’t resolve. You are not given a Yay! Happy Ending. You will turn the last page and be dissatisfied. Welcome to BIPOC world.

1.5 stars rounding up to 2.

Spoiler

First, I didn't especially care for Moss. He felt inconsistent as a character.

Second, I also thought that the actions of the police were over the top. I'm sure they really do do or have half the things discussed (Silent Guardian, the Mosquito thing, etc.), but it just felt too much. Especially to roll out in a high school that never mentions gang violence. A high school with so little funds as to fix water leaks strikes a bargain with the Oakland PD to get metal detectors, but not just any metal detectors; military/war grade ones?
It just did not seem authentic. And my husband has a rod in his leg... a titanium rod. We've been through TSA, metal detectors, etc. It's never been a problem. Then the metal detectors magnetize a kid with a metal rod in his leg while he's on crutches... plus tragic backstory...and then he was just learning to walk again... but this incident ruins his possible ability to ever walk again, but his friends saved him by turning of the machine!..even after the principal/AP arrived and couldn't do a damn thing...plus not one of the cops had any idea how to work the machine or the desire to stop someone from being hurt...

"How do you do it, Moss?

"Do what?"

"Exist. When the world hates you so much."

How uplifting. I kept expecting it to go dystopian.

I am in the middle with the police. I think there are good cops and bad cops. I think African Americans and other minorities are targeted and killed, without a doubt. But the police in this story were vilified to the extreme. And Moss spitting in Daley's face was just unnecessary. He could have been better than that. Don't forgive; be angry. Walk away. Say a cutting comment. Yell. But to spit in someone's face? Uncouth. And what kind of role model is that?
I also don't think all the running from the cops really helped Moss, either. I think it exacerbated the situation(s). There is a lot of drama.

And finally, I felt like every possible type of diverse character that could have been thrown in was. You've got trans, nonbinary, asexual, lesbian parents, single parents, Hispanic female adopted by a white couple, a kid in a wheelchair, etc. I love diversity and think it is incredibly important, but it felt like they threw in every possible diverse option. Plus, Moss has anxiety and lacks self-confidence, which I can completely identify with, but it did not seem consistent with his character and was just one more "label." And some of them had back stories that dropped hints (Reg) before finally, unnecessarily, explaining the relevance. And then adding in the mom's back story to protesting just was more unnecessary side/back story drama. They threw in every possible assumption or stereotype just so it could be refuted. I would have preferred less of that and more character development or depth on a handful of characters; I couldn't keep track of everyone.


This was 450+ pages of tiny font and packed leading (space between lines). This story could have been significantly shorter. Like the 1/2 page explaining how everyone's nickname or even given name came to be. Come on. Too much ...extra stuff.

This concept is incredibly important and relevant. I just think this book didn't do it justice.

To be entirely honest, I don't think this story is for me for various reasons, and that's not a bad thing. One of the reasons it's not for me is because I'm not USian and though police brutality exists in my country, it's nothing like what happens in the US.

Anyway, I have no criticism of the story itself, of the unapologetic anger (I loved that), of what it's trying to say overall. It's a powerful book, and though I do like my books to be more hopeful than this one was overall, I don't think my frustration at that was a bad thing, I think it shows the book did what it wanted to achieve.

My problems are more with the characters and writing than anything else, especially anything concerning the plot or themes. The writing was not super easy to get through, and I don't know if I would have finished the book if I hadn't had the audio and the physical copy at the same time to help my brain with it. I can often look past writing I find to be meh if the story and characters are really good, and honestly I would have given this a good 3 stars if it wasn't for the two character-related things that bothered me the most.

I know this has gotten criticism for ticking diversity boxes, or the queer characters not experiencing enough discrimination at school or whatever, but this didn't bother me, far from it, I enjoyed the rep within the group of friends immensely.

But everything relating to Reg's disability was... bad. First, the scene where the metal detectors destroy his leg got me out of the story instantly. Metal detectors don't do that. Even if they did (as it's explained vaguely later that the machines weren't actually normal metal detectors), I can't believe that in the whole school that went before Reg, nobody forgot to take out their keys or to take off a belt, nobody had braces, etc. It's a technicality but one that changes the plot massively if it's changed so. I felt weird about it. But let's say I manage to suspend my disbelief about that. Reg taking the time to smile and thank Moss for being such a good ally before passing out from overwhelming pain did not sit super right with me. I could have ignored that if there wasn't then a scene where students carry Reg's wheelchair without asking him when he comes back to school. Please, isn't this politeness 101? Then, a tiny bit later, they stage a walkout using a hashtag called something like "EveryoneWalksInWestOakland" and... did Reg approve of that? Did someone ask him about it? At the very end, too, Reg has to reassure Moss that he didn't fail him and that he's so amazing for caring that his friend got hurt when no one else would have and I just rolled my eyes so hard. I didn't like the treatment of disability at all here, and that's probably my biggest critcisim of the book to be honest.

I didn't like the storyline around Esperanza either, but I feel like my opinion on that is a little bit more subjective and personal. I just felt like she was the only character that was truly flawed and had room to grow, and that she was punished for it. Esperanza is Latina and a lesbian, adopted by white parents. Her white parents do white parents stuff that I expected to happen, but I was a little taken aback by how badly she was blamed for her parents' actions. And for saying some stuff that was influenced by her parents. All stuff that could have probably been resolved by difficult conversations with Moss, but the book ended up going in the direction of "ah, now that she's gotten beaten up by the police, she understands, and she profusely apologizes to Moss for not understanding" and like... okay, not the best route I could have hoped for, but the worse was Moss' reaction that was like "oh now she gets it, but I don't know if my best friend getting beaten up by the police will ever be enough for me to forgive her for not 100% understanding me and agreeing with me on the first try". It just didn't really work for me, Moss' hatred for Esperanza over a few ignorant comments felt so difficult to understand, and honestly maybe it's a failure on my part, but I just couldn't go along with it.

I know a lot of people have also disliked the fact that a gay character dies, and I think I would have too if I hadn't read it in the TWs before reading the book, because it can be quite difficult to stumble onto, but I didn't really mind, I understood the point of it.

I was less convinced by Moss' character in general. I don't mind the unapologetic anger. I kind of have weird feelings I'm not sure I can articulate around how everyone around him had to centre his anger over theirs. His mom, in particular, never gets to be angry or at least upset at him for his outbursts, she always soothes him. And I get that they have this amazing relationship, but there's one scene where it really felt like she had to make her desires and feelings smaller than her son's anger.

Anyway yeah, I liked the story, and the tone, and the message. I mostly enjoyed the plot, weird metal detector scene aside. I had more trouble with the character, how some of them were treated, and I guess how glorified the MC was at times, compared to his actual role in staging the protests and all that (especially in the first half, it's more understandable later on). It would likely have been 3 stars still without the ableism (the carrying the wheelchair scene was what put me off the most, I think, and after that I had a bit of a hard time getting into it again).

This is my first review on Goodreads, and it is out of pure dislike of this book.

Do not come into this book expecting representation. You will be met with tokenism and 2-dimensionality. Countless characters like Bits, Esperanza, Njemile, and Rawiya are introduced just to receive absolutely no characterization or depth. Bits is non-binary and...what, doesn't say a lot? That's not even really true in the book, as Bits has extended conversations with Moss and other characters. Who the hell is Rawiya? She only exists to check off "Muslim" on the checklist and make her a "cool different" Muslim by having her enjoy punk music. Which isn't even explored. There is not one character who grows during the course of the book, or even has any character depth to begin with. Lines are spoken to no effect and have literally no consequence on the rest of the book.

This is a poor man's The Hate U Give. I'm not even done with it and already the dialogue is much better than the stilted crap you get in this book. Teenagers don't...talk like that. They don't act like that. It's utterly hilarious that the author is Latinx, because the Hispanic characters' dialogue....holy shit. No one talks like that--no one just throws in random words in Spanish while talking in English. Just...what???

I thought this book was going to be interesting-hell, isn't the synopsis something to behold? A young black gay teen with a mental illness deals with the effects of police brutality. That sounds extremely promising. I started out the book optimistically--when I saw Moss and Esperanza, his adopted Puerto Rican best friend who is also a lesbian, I was over the moon. Wow, I thought, I can't wait to learn more about her!

The situation with Esperanza, and indeed most of the women in this book is probably the most dire of all. First of all, Esperanza is immediately demonized for her lack of perspective in issues facing people of color. You'd think the book would show some sympathy for her-she feels out of place in both worlds, she can't connect with her own identity, her BEST FRIEND shuns her and verbally abuses her for weeks just because, what, she made a comment that pissed him off specifically and wasn't even bad? No no no no, Esperanza was in the WRONG here. SHE has to apologize to Moss, the whiniest, most violent and ill-behaved character in the book. She is put in her place for being around white people. How dare she...have been adopted by well-off people, I guess. That's really the extent of it. I'm not even going to get into the misogynistic ways other women who """wrong""" Moss are dealt with in the book.

God, I could go on forever. Moss is never accountable for anything he does wrong, every white person is evil by default

Spoiler

(except Hailey, who dies a chapter later, do with that what you will)

, diverse characters need only ~exist~ to be well-written and count as representation, and there's some...weird pseudo-CIA shit going on in Oakland? I don't know.

tldr; Don't read this book, not if you're a POC, not if you're white, not if you're queer, not if you're straight, do not read it under any circumstances. It is 500+ pages of uninteresting hateful dialogue between characters whose only character traits are their minority statuses.

A powerful book! Made all the more powerful by how Oakland specific it and all the truth that comes with that.

I picked up this book because I was so annoyed by the overuse of the word boyfriend in the Sun and the Star and wanted to see if Rick Riordan's coauthor was to blame. Boy, was I not prepared for this.

I was sucked in immediately. This is a story of a gay, black teen whose dad was killed "accidently" by the police. It is a story of love (such a sweet romance), panic attacks, anger, and gut wrenching violence.

From my place of privilege I wanted the cops in this story to not all be the bad guys, to have some nuance but that's not the point or the reality, is it?

Heart breaking.