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readwithmaramiloandmaple's review against another edition
5.0
I saw the Graham Norton Show episode where Benedict Cumberbatch told his ‘pengwing’ story, that and the knowledge that he plays Dr Strange had been the stock total I knew about him. Whilst this book DOES impart all kinds of interesting stories about Benedict Cumberbatch, as the title states, it really is NOT what the book is about. On one hand the conversational language dishes up some hilarious laugh-out-loud moments and on the other also a thought provoking exploration of the idea that ‘why don’t women carve time out for themselves to pursue a hobby/passion in the same way men make time to watch football/play golf’. At the risk of sounding ‘ageist’ I suspect readers will fall into two categories with this book, those who “get it” easily relating to the story (40+ mums) and those who don’t. I found myself nodding along as I recognised many of my own lived experiences (minus the whole Benedict Cumberbatch thing). This would be a great book club discussion piece to ponder “do females really get short changed when it comes to play, fun and joy?”
whatthedickinson's review against another edition
5.0
This was such a personal book for me. It starts off documenting one woman’s intense interest in those cheekbones (relatable), and delves into a multi-perspective investigation on women’s experiences in desire, joy, curiosity, creativity.
About 6 years ago I was obsessed with BBC Sherlock. OBSESSED. I made both my brothers watch the entire thing separately and would pause it to comment on how the lighting in one scene was a queer coded bisexual flag. I read many articles analysing each episode in extreme detail. My friends gave me Sherlock pillows, John Watson mugs. My ringtone was the Sherlock theme song. My phone’s “name” is still ‘Captain John Hamish Hotson’ when it connects to Bluetooth.
I was thirsty, as the author says in the book when talking about obsession.
“Thirsty, but only for water from one particular well.”
But I was embarrassed! A grown woman, who loved a TV show more than (basically) anything else. But this is an experience all women have. Not with Sherlock (lol), but with feeling embarrassed or guilty for enjoying something, being passionate about something.
I loved that author’s journey from trying to intellectualise female shame of enjoying ‘silly’ hobbies (ie. “I don’t really LIKE romance/pop music/makeup/insert interest here”) to being proud of knowing what you actually want and just bloody doing it. It’s the opposite of capitalism, of production, of always trying to be the right type of woman.
“Passion, fun. Grace freely given, joy freely shared. It’s the opposite of work. It’s play. Assignment of your time to whatever the fuck you feel like. It’s just… utter delight.”
I also loved all the interviews with various people with obsessions, how it impacted them and how they were afraid of others would think. It was so refreshing to hear about SO many people (literally millions) accessing Archive of our Own, a place that was so safe and amazing.
I’ll end with beautiful poem by Mary Oliver, excerpts included in this book.
If you suddenly and unexpectedly feel joy, don’t hesitate.
Give in to it.
There are plenty of lives and whole towns destroyed or about to be.
We are not wise, and not very often kind.
And much can never be redeemed.
Still, life has some possibility left.
Perhaps this is its way of fighting back,
that sometimes something happens better than all the riches or power in the world.
It could be anything,
but very likely you notice it in the instant when love begins.
Anyway, that’s often the case.
Anyway, whatever it is, don’t be afraid of its plenty.
Joy is not made to be a crumb.
About 6 years ago I was obsessed with BBC Sherlock. OBSESSED. I made both my brothers watch the entire thing separately and would pause it to comment on how the lighting in one scene was a queer coded bisexual flag. I read many articles analysing each episode in extreme detail. My friends gave me Sherlock pillows, John Watson mugs. My ringtone was the Sherlock theme song. My phone’s “name” is still ‘Captain John Hamish Hotson’ when it connects to Bluetooth.
I was thirsty, as the author says in the book when talking about obsession.
“Thirsty, but only for water from one particular well.”
But I was embarrassed! A grown woman, who loved a TV show more than (basically) anything else. But this is an experience all women have. Not with Sherlock (lol), but with feeling embarrassed or guilty for enjoying something, being passionate about something.
I loved that author’s journey from trying to intellectualise female shame of enjoying ‘silly’ hobbies (ie. “I don’t really LIKE romance/pop music/makeup/insert interest here”) to being proud of knowing what you actually want and just bloody doing it. It’s the opposite of capitalism, of production, of always trying to be the right type of woman.
“Passion, fun. Grace freely given, joy freely shared. It’s the opposite of work. It’s play. Assignment of your time to whatever the fuck you feel like. It’s just… utter delight.”
I also loved all the interviews with various people with obsessions, how it impacted them and how they were afraid of others would think. It was so refreshing to hear about SO many people (literally millions) accessing Archive of our Own, a place that was so safe and amazing.
I’ll end with beautiful poem by Mary Oliver, excerpts included in this book.
If you suddenly and unexpectedly feel joy, don’t hesitate.
Give in to it.
There are plenty of lives and whole towns destroyed or about to be.
We are not wise, and not very often kind.
And much can never be redeemed.
Still, life has some possibility left.
Perhaps this is its way of fighting back,
that sometimes something happens better than all the riches or power in the world.
It could be anything,
but very likely you notice it in the instant when love begins.
Anyway, that’s often the case.
Anyway, whatever it is, don’t be afraid of its plenty.
Joy is not made to be a crumb.
ellabeas's review against another edition
5.0
I read this because my brilliant friend gave it to me when I was lamenting about my 2023 reading list being primarily romances recommended by a blogger I like. She pressed this book in my hands and told me to read it. And to NOT feel guilty for reading romances even though actual literature exists in the world. Thank you, Stephanie!
So what is this about? Benedict Cumberbatch? A primer on feminist principles? Unabashedly loving whatever it is you like? Well kind of. But it is also so much more.
Because of this book I am reviewing what delights me. What are my interests? What am I guarded about that I could enjoy so much more if I just allowed myself to really love it? And why the hell is every hobby a woman has supposed to be virtuous!?!
Yes, I recommend you read this. Even if the fandom gets excessive at times (I admittedly do not see the appeal of Benedict Cumberbatch), this is definitely worth the read.
Skip this if there is something you would rather read but pick up other books because you think you “should”. Just read what you want.
4.5 rounded up. I read a paper copy but think this would work well in digital and audio formats.
So what is this about? Benedict Cumberbatch? A primer on feminist principles? Unabashedly loving whatever it is you like? Well kind of. But it is also so much more.
Because of this book I am reviewing what delights me. What are my interests? What am I guarded about that I could enjoy so much more if I just allowed myself to really love it? And why the hell is every hobby a woman has supposed to be virtuous!?!
Yes, I recommend you read this. Even if the fandom gets excessive at times (I admittedly do not see the appeal of Benedict Cumberbatch), this is definitely worth the read.
Skip this if there is something you would rather read but pick up other books because you think you “should”. Just read what you want.
4.5 rounded up. I read a paper copy but think this would work well in digital and audio formats.
mmsbeatty's review against another edition
5.0
This is a must for any woman or female IDing person who has ever loved something so much they wanted to eat it.
kccampbell_pc's review against another edition
4.0
Enlightening not profound. A book about allowing yourself to find an obsession enough to bring you joy.