I received this book for free from the publisher as part of a Goodreads giveaway. This is no way affected my thoughts on this book

There is something akin to privilege, and something immediately humbling, in reading something that wasn't written to be read. In the prologue, Decca Aitkenhead makes it clear that this book is not for us, and whether or not we forget it isn't of concern to her. I wish I could sum up my gratitude for a book written with that magnitude of honesty. This isn't a memoir written for income or for fame or for setting the record straight; it is a story that is written so that it may be told, and that is so refreshing, so revolutionary simple, I felt like it was worth mentioning before anything else.

Had this been a simple story about random tragedy, and a family attempting to put the pieces back together afterwards, All at Sea would have been worth it. But Aitkenhead exceeds the expected. This is a book about unfathomable loss and the grief that accompanies it, yes, but it's also about race and the cultural flexibility inherent in interracial relationships. It's about love and family, the ones we're born into and the ones we make. It's about trauma and healing and real life character development, all everyday miracles we overlook.

Aitkenhead's story is beautifully and attentively crafted. Her grief is palpable on every page and her skill as a storyteller, revealing the many facets of her love and loss of her partner, is undeniable. The only bad thing I have to say about it is that Aitkenhead writes so intelligently, I noticed a lack of intimacy I'm familiar with in memoirs. Her background in journalism and academia shows, which isn't a bad thing, though it does take some time to get used to. While I eventually became captivated with this, reading half the book in a single sitting, it did take me a while to get into.

Overall though, All at Sea is a refreshing addition to the genre, and while it is wise, it is never pretentious. Though I received this book for free, I would have gladly paid full price for it.

This was not an easy book to read, and I almost put it down several times. It’s a tragic memoir written by a journalist living in the UK. She and her life partner,Tony, have two young sons together. Tony drowns while trying to save their drowning 4 year old son. The child lives, the father dies. Decca Aitkenhead is forced to begin dealing with heart-wrenching grief. As the book unfolds, we learn of Tony’s secret drug addition and criminal background. This was shocking; however, it’s not my place to judge him or their relationship. Aitkenhead explains that she wrote the memoir to get peace, healing, and closure. I hope she accomplished this and is able move on with her life. I can’t even begin to imagine the pain she endured.

Heartbreaking. a true and honest picture of grief. Maybe too soon a read for me, but maybe it would always be too soon

This is an exquisitely written, gutwrenching memoir about a woman whose husband (technically, they weren't married) drowns in front of her while he saves their young son. Decca is an award-winning journalist in England, and it shows in her writing of this book. The narrative of Tony's drowning is so heartbreaking and raw, I almost couldn't finish reading this book because it was too easy to imagine my own husband dying. The book takes us back to Decca and Tony's relationship, and anyone looking for a model citizen won't enjoy this book. These two very unlikely people meet as neighbors. Both are married, and Tony is a cocaine dealer and ex-con who smokes crack. Decca is somehow drawn to him, and they start an affair. They soon leave their miserable marriages and become an unlikely couple, having two sons and moving to the country. Tony does get his life together, but neither he nor Decca seem bothered much by his past violence, crack smoking, seeming abandonment of his older daughter, and both of their affairs, so if that bothers you, this book is not for you. But Decca gives an unflinching account of what it's like to lose your life partner and all the details about how to cope afterward.

This was a quick read and fascinating. It was a seemingly honest explanation of a life unexpectedly cut short and how Aitkinhead dealt with the early fallout of her partner's death.

Decca was vacationing in Jamaica with her partner, Tony, and their two sons when her one son got pulled out to sea. Tony dove in to rescue him and saved their son, but Tony ended up drowning. All At Sea is Decca’s memoir about her relationship with Tony and moving through grief after his tragic death. This was emotional at times and was interesting reading about their lives before the accident. Great read!